i need to add things to my topic sentence but i need help.. we are writting a summary and these are my facts:1.taunting rex baum they threw sticks and leaves. 2. smeared human feces on baum's face before cutting him with a knife. 3. they hurled everthing from rocks and bricks, even his bargecue gril. 4. they soon got carried away when they stated punching and kicking him. and now that i have those written my topic sentence needs work so far i have : three drunk teens tragically ended a life.. now i have to add to it.... please help!!!!

Question

anonymous · Answer

Why do you need to add to it? The topic sentence should be short and to the point.

anonymous · Answer

she is a picky teacher and said it is too short so i need to add to it ... but im not sure what to put.... :/

anonymous · Answer

Well, this sounds like a summary of a news event so I suppose adding a date into the topic sentence would be good too.

Example: "On October 18, 3 drunk teens..."

anonymous · Answer

well thats what i had but she said that was a fact and i had to take out the date but to add something else...

anonymous · Answer

what exactly is this you're writing? Are you writing a summary of a news event?

anonymous · Answer

yes

anonymous · Answer

"The decisions made by underage drinkers pose serious problems for the rest of society." ??

Or you could mention "sport killings" since Rex Baum was a victim of sport killings.

anonymous · Answer

ok thank you this is alot of help!

anonymous · Answer

what you could do is add a date, write out the word teens, or add the name and age of the victim, for example:
"On December 3rs, three drunk teenagers tragically ended the life of Rex Baum, 18."