"On Thursday, my period three class went to the health fair." How can I improve my sentence.

Question

anonymous · Answer

You can change it up a bit to make it flow better. Or you could add more detail to the sentence. During my third period class on Thursday, we all went to the health fair and we had tons of fun!

anonymous · Answer

How you construct your sentence depends on what point you want to emphasize most.  What is most important in the sentence?  

Who went?  > "My period three class went to the health fair on Thursday."

The day you went?  >  "On Thursday, my period three class went to the health fair."  

The fact that you went to the health fair?  "The health fair was attended by my period three class on Thursday." (yes, passive voice has its appropriate uses, too)

Whichever you wish to emphasize the most should come first. 

Also considering stepping up your verb "went" a bit by replacing it with a 
more descriptive words, such as:   "attended the" , "traveled to the", "had the pleasure of attending the", "enjoyed attending the", etc.