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OpenStudy (anonymous):
I need help in correcting this essay so far, and adding on to it.
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OpenStudy (anonymous):
in an essay your thesis has to be the last or second to last sentence in the first paragraph.
OpenStudy (anonymous):
That always adds another sentence.
OpenStudy (anonymous):
Feel free to add on, my computer crashed earlier and I'm having writers block. I'm just trying to clean it up.
OpenStudy (anonymous):
you either need a period after "the following day" or a lower case L in loud noises.
OpenStudy (anonymous):
You keep it third person narrative I don't see any I's, you's, me's etc.
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OpenStudy (anonymous):
Grammar wise and without writing in first person narrative it looks good that way.
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