I need to revise my thesis statements for an arguable thesis , Im writing 2 - 300 word essay ( editor letter) in my college class. I have my thesis but my teacher said it was wrong, which I don't understand why. Its about Big Brother Big Sister Organization and, I picked 1) Donation and 2) Becoming a member ...
Organization: Big Brothers and Big Sisters of Columbia, Missouri
Thesis 1 : The money you could donate will help support the community's Big Brother Big Sister program.
Thesis 2: .A way you should help your community is becoming apart of the Big Brother Big Sister Organization

Question

I need to revise my thesis statements for an arguable thesis , Im writing 2 - 300 word essay ( editor letter) in my college class. I have my thesis but my teacher said it was wrong, which I don't understand why. Its about Big Brother Big Sister Organization and, I picked 1) Donation and 2) Becoming a member ...
Organization: Big Brothers and Big Sisters of Columbia, Missouri 
Thesis 1 : The  money you could donate will  help support the community's Big Brother Big Sister program.
Thesis 2: .A way you should help your community is becoming apart of the Big Brother Big Sister Organization