Would any one be willing to read my story? it was supposed to be a short story, but it kinda turned into 9 pages. :/ but i would love it if some one read it for me, just to tell me what you think. thanks in advanced. :)

Question

anonymous · Answer

@wolfe8 @aurorablue01 @AuroraB @patrickthestar @wild_rebel_gurl21 @willreel @cutecupcake @esshotwired @Orwell84 any one please XD

anonymous · Answer

this is mai story :) hope you like itt

wolfe8 · Answer

As I said in the other post, I can't open files that use Microsoft Office. I also don't think I'll be reading anything that long anytime soon...

anonymous · Answer

okay :/

wolfe8 · Answer

If you give me the PDF I can skim it

anonymous · Answer

okay thanks so much XD, i hope you like it!

anonymous · Answer

Dont have time to read it, but just gonna let you know that a short story is 1,000 to 20,000 words, so technically, it's still a short story :P Since you have around 15,000

anonymous · Answer

Sorry, read it wrong, you only have around 3000 - 4000 words lol

wolfe8 · Answer

Some mistakes I think: 
Paragraph 2 page 1 'I' instead of 'it'
Paragraph 4 page 1 "The second letter is just reminded him of the rules, and consequences"

At this point I stopped reading word by word and started skimming. I'd say you aren't consistent with your tenses. Sometimes it's present, sometimes past. You might wanna reread it with that in mind.

anonymous · Answer

okay thanks so much wolfe XD

wolfe8 · Answer

No problem. Good job and good luck :)

anonymous · Answer

ricky! :D ill read it!!! <33333

anonymous · Answer

Another mistake I noticed was at one point you typed "garbage pin" instead of garbage bin".

anonymous · Answer

ahahah okayy

anonymous · Answer

Like you found a man sitting in a garbage bag inside of a pinhead in the trash can. lol