can some please reword my history paper.
its only 2 paragraphs? Or tell me what I should change about it.

Question

kimberlyevens · Answer

I believe that if at any time we could change from capitalism, to socialism, or even communism our economy would be extremely strong. For example right now communism would be perfect. People would learn to save their money and once they get out of debt (if they are in debt) they could go on living their life’s, until everything is settled. Although if I were to pick one of these three to improve the industrial world I would pick, Socialism. 
 Robert Owen was horrified by the living and work conditions as many were, but he actually did something about it. Not only did he deal with those conditions but also he made sure no one under 10 years old was working in dangerous factories. Instead he made sure the children were going to school, and getting a good education so that they would be able to make a good enough for a living when they grew up. Also, so they could make the industrial world a better place to live in. I agree with Owen on how workers and owners should share the profits. By sharing profits, it allows the workers to be living off of a good wage while the businessmen can still be making a decent amount, and also keep the business running and workers safe. I think his ideas offer the most hope for not only improving the industrial world but, everyone’s life’s and living styles.

anonymous · Answer

What is the prompt of your history paper?

anonymous · Answer

It depends  on your teacher, but my  English teacher says that you should never put I think, I believe or anything like that because in your essays you should be confident as if your answer is the only correct one, but I guess it just depends on the teacher you have. Also in your first paragraph you wrote life's when it should be lives. Hope that helped a little.