Question

I learned about Romanticism, so I wanted to attempt poem to attempt to mimic the feeling, of Edgar Allan Poe's work.

Honestly it came out nothing like it. Advice wanted.

Answer 1

I am always tired, but I never sleep.
I seem fine, but I actually weep.
Everything I do seems to be wrong.
I am sick, and tired of pretending to be strong.

I want to give up, but I know I cannot.
I hold it inside until I rave arrant.
There are terrors in my mind, that never seem to quell.
It seems as if the pain will never end.

I pretend to care about what I do.
When all I do is try to get through.
I feel down and depressed all the time.
Even now as I write this rhyme.

I struggle to understand this supposedly meaningful world.
I have yet to learn my lesson on life.
Is there nothing I can do to malce the path straight?
Is all I can do pretend to be great?

All the pain and hurt I hold.
All these feelings have gotten too old.

So as this poem comes to an end.
Unlike those who may give a final goodbye.
I would rather like to weep.
Weep with you as my friend.
Side by side, till the battle of the night may end.

Answer 2

Advice wanted such as:
Better choice of words, grammar fixes or suggestions, wordplay, etc.

Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Answer 3

i actually like it

Answer 4

this is pretty good whats the rhyme theme supposed tho be. eg., ABAB CDCD EFEF GHGH

Answer 5

There is no major rhyme theme to this poem that I adhere to. I try to avoid making poems based on a rhyme theme, because if I do the poems tends to write its self, and fails to express my emotions.

Answer 6

I think it sounds good!

Answer 7

Perfect!

Answer 8

Thank you for the compliments, criticism is good too so if you have any please speak.

Answer 9

I really enjoyed reading this ! English is not my native tongue , so I can't really help much . I don't see any mistakes . If you want better reviews , you should post this on DeviantArt . c:

Answer 10

Thank you, I guess I will when I have the time, however writing is not really my thing. :-P

Answer 11

You write very well c:

Answer 12

In terms of being like Poe's poetry, it's really not, but I think you just went with your gut and wrote about your own feelings. Poe basically wrote nightmares. Yours is something like confessional poetry. Poe used dark, frightening stories to portray dark, frightening themes, mostly about death. He didn't write his own feelings outright, but through themes. But he died drunk and naked in a gutter in Baltimore, so I wouldn't worry too much about emulating him.

Poetry and any type of writing can be a great tool for dealing with your emotions. Try just writing for yourself--just see what comes out--and don't expect anything magnificent at first.

And honey, we will all spend our entire lives trying to understand the world. (Except maybe for religious fanatics. They have a book that explains it all.)

Answer 13

Poe's work was the aim to emulate, however so was going with the theme of Romanticism. It seems that I was successful in that part at least for emotion. As far as poetry goes, I think it is more to me just a good skill to amaze, but not useful to convey emotion as poetry nearly always ends up being subjective to the end reader. As for most religious doctrine, it gives the purpose of existence, and how to construct ourselves to please God. When I say, "I struggle to understand this supposedly meaningful world" I mean, how to apply the natural world to the realm of God's mind. In essence theology, since the supposed is purpose of existence, but meaning is natural and developed.

Thank you for the advice.

Answer 14

very nice.... impressive... @Algorithmic