Can someone give me feedback on my final draft?
I'm supposed to do a 2-3 page argumentative essay. Comments and criticism greatly appreciated. Will fan and medal!
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Snndzjs9Om55avvSSTH73CPsx3ojTSQqpFnOsbDncv8/edit?usp=sharing

Question

Can someone give me feedback on my final draft?
I'm supposed to do a 2-3 page argumentative essay. Comments and criticism greatly appreciated. Will fan and medal!
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Snndzjs9Om55avvSSTH73CPsx3ojTSQqpFnOsbDncv8/edit?usp=sharing

anonymous · Answer

Please! I need advice TONIGHT.

anonymous · Answer

Anyone? I just need to know if it makes sense, and if there's anything I should change...

sammixboo · Answer

Well it is always good to have a transition at the beginning of each body paragraph of your argumentative essay, and a transition at the beginning of your conclusion, like:

In conclusion, the expansion of small-to-medium-sized towns leads to commercialization and generification, thus causing the loss of a town’s unique atmosphere. So what can we do to slow their expansion? We can write letters to the editor, the mayor of our town, or to city council members. We can tell others about the importance of opposing expansion. We can vote for leaders who are anti-expansion. We can do all these things, and we should. It is up to us.

I think you did really good writing this!

anonymous · Answer

Awesome, thanks. Good advice. :)