Ok, im writing a paper about cancer and i need a good attention grabber, is this good?, "The incessant beeping of a heart monitor, but not knowing if it will stop, the doctor talking quietly on the other side of the door, the air conditioner hitting a hairless head-this is the experience for most cancer victims."

Question

anonymous · Answer

That's great! @Food,HuntingandGod224

anonymous · Answer

Thanks @KittyT

anonymous · Answer

YOur welcome! <3

anonymous · Answer

I agree.
I think you should add more detail though, and maybe a few other things, such as painful treatment, sleepless nights, constant pain, etc.
But this is pretty good already :)

kyanthedoodle · Answer

Don't listen to mattagarrett! This is perfect! (Just kidding...sorta)