Question

I need to wright a narrative introduction. Could you guys review it and help me fix it and make it better.

Answer 1

It was finally Friday . TIK TOCK. TICK TOCK. I couldn't wait to get out of school. Five more minutes and I will be out of here. I tapped my pencil rapidly on my desk. The bell went off and kids ran out of school. "Hey Christopher! Wait up!" It was my best friend Dan. We have been friends since preschool. He ran over to me and patted me on the back. We sat at a bench and waited for the school bus. When we sat down we saw a big yellow flyer that said:
BARLOW'S GREAT NORTH AMERICAN CIRCUS.
Now in its triumphal march across the continent, will
give two grand performances,
AT SMYRNA
on the afternoon and evening of May 18th.
Never in all its history has this
unparalleled show embraced a greater variety of attractions,
or included a larger number of world-famous
acrobats, clowns, bare back riders, rope walkers, trapeze
artists, and star performers,
in addition to a colossal menagerie, comprising
elephants, tigers, lions, leopards,
and other wild animals in great variety.
All this and far more, including a hundred
DARING ACTS,
can be seen for the trifling sum of fifty cents;
children half price.
COME ONE! COME ALL!

We looked at each other with excitement. The bus arrived and we hoped on. We couldn't wait to go home and ask our parents to go to the circus.

Answer 2

I like it.