Question

Can someone revise a article I am writing for school?

Answer 1

whats it about?

Answer 2

@Tpunt1125 http://www.cnn.com/2015/10/27/health/death-rate-down/index.html

Answer 3

One of the biggest causes of premature deaths are:
Heart disease,
Cancer,
Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease,
Accidents,
Stroke and diabetes (between 1969-2013)
But the good is that the overall death rate has dropped 42.9% over the past 4 decades! This means that scientist and Doctors are doing an amazing job on improving modern medicine. There is always still room for improvement.

Answer 4

that is what is what i have so far

Answer 5

good start

Answer 6

Also could you help me with ideas to add more things?

Answer 7

sure

Answer 8

Can you read the article then

Answer 9

In order to get what I am writing about.

Answer 10

Hello?

Answer 11

I reading it lol

Answer 12

One of the biggest causes of premature deaths are: Heart disease, Cancer, Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, Accidents, Stroke and diabetes (Between 1969-2013.) The some good news about this is that the overall death rate has dropped 42.9%. What’s more amazing is it happened in just the past 4 decades! Two main reasons of why major causes of death have become less lethal are little amounts of exposure to risks and enhanced medical treatment. This means that scientist and doctors are doing an amazing job improving modern medicine. However, there is always still room for improvement. If we were to reduce the smoking and alcohol consumption it could decrease the death rate even more. Plus changing the way we eat and exercising more causing our bodies to become healthier will help from contracting a stroke, diabetes or heart diseases.

Answer 13

I added a little more to your work but that is the best I could come up with.

Answer 14

Make that will cause in the last sentence

Answer 15

and that will help for the same sentence

Answer 16

Sorry I went afk