Question

Tell me what you think about my story below. Please be honest. By the way, I just turned 13 on November 2nd and for school, I'm almost 100% finished with 8th grade. I go to k12. I am completely open to any questions, critiques, or suggestions you might have. One last thing, if you wanted to read this story on Wattpad, here's the link to my user: https://www.wattpad.com/user/MeadowTaylor5 The story is called Phoenix and the Stone of Knowledge. Here's the discription by the way:

A little girl named Phoenix, abandoned by her parents, is raised by dragons. The dragon leader says that when she turned 13 years old, she would have the power to restore peace to all the worlds if she can find an enchanted stone called the Stone of Knowledge. Will she be able to or will she turn her back on the good side and destroy everything?


P.S. I'm a girl and I will always be working on new chapters. :D

Answer 1

Chapter 1
Phoenix

Sitting on the dew-covered grass at the bottom of a mountain, there was a neatly woven basket. In it, there was a screaming baby girl, wrapped in a soft, pink blanket. All of a sudden, a huge dragon landed right next to the screaming infant. It was light purple and had soft, sky blue eyes. The baby stopped screaming the instant she saw it. She looked at the dragon with a curious gaze. Suddenly, the dragon shape-shifted into what looked like a human girl, maybe 13 years old. She had wavy chocolate brown hair and glistening blue eyes. She spoke softly.

"Don't be frightened. My name is Katrina," she said calmly to the baby, as if it could understand her.

Katrina whistled and a bald eagle soared down from the foggy sky and perched atop her arm. She then turned her head to the eagle.

"Hyron, thank you for coming so quick. I'll take her to Dragon Forest and I'll meet you on the edge. Go tell Tarin that he has a guest, but don't tell him about me or her," she said, gesturing to the baby.

The eagle nodded and lifted up into the air. Katrina turned into a dragon again, took the basket, and dashed off to the top of the mountain. She soared gracefully through the air until they landed at the top of the mountain.

Where there should have been a point at the summit, there was a large flat area covered in trees and groups of mystical creatures. There were angels, centaurs, fairies, unicorns, lots of dragons, and many more enchanting legendary creatures. Katrina landed on the edge of the mountain top forest. All the creatures stopped and crowded around her and the baby and began murmuring to each other. A huge shadow blocked out the sun and everyone turned around. A huge dragon stood behind the group. It was a dark green color, also with sky blue eyes.

"What's all the commotion about? Who sent Hyron?" It demanded.

"Tarin. I sent Hyron," Katrina said, turning into a human again. "It's been a long time since I've last seen you."

"Katrina?" Tarin said, sounding surprised. "Why have you come?"

The crowd parted as Tarin came closer.

"I heard this poor little baby girl making a racket at the bottom," said Katrina, glancing at the baby. "I have been watching her. Her parents didn't want her, so they simply abandoned her at the base of this mountain, leaving her to die. I was hoping you would take her in. She'd be a lot better off with you. Please..." Katrina's voice trailed off as she put her head down. The baby opened her eyes as Tarin came closer. Katrina lifted her head slightly. She knew she didn't need to go any further, trying to convince him.

Tarin shape-shifted, just as Katrina had done, into a human. He looked ageless. He had golden hair and bright blue eyes.

"We'll keep her," he said. "Hopefully, she turns out better than Cyrona," Tarin trailed off.

"She will," Katrina said assuringly as she sighed with relief. "Well, the first thing we should do is name her" she continued "What do you think would be a suitable name?"

Just at that moment, a Phoenix flew over the baby and shed one of its feathers into the basket. According to legend, you were considered blessed to have a Phoenix gift you a feather.

"Phoenix," Tarin said. "That's her name."

"Perfect," Katrina said. "I really wish I could stay, but I had better get back to Boronia before anyone notices I've been gone."

Tarin nodded as Katrina kissed Phoenix on the forehead.

"Good luck, Phoenix" she said softly. "Someday, you'll change the world. I just know it."

Answer 2

OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Answer 3

I will do only one chapter at a time, so tell if me if you want to see the next chapter. If 5 people request another chapter, I will post it here. :)

Answer 4

Like it, @Kirby171?

Answer 5

Yeah, btw I'm on wattpad too :)

Answer 6

Ok!