Question

Can I get some strict feedback on a piece of mine? I'm trying to make it the best I can.

Answer 1

I can’t beat these instincts
So many things I’ve lost
In this literal hell
Can someone help me through this scuffle
I can’t manage myself

So what if you see the wildest side of me?
Don’t hope that you can alter this devil, so long subdued
Please persuade me, it’s an illusion
Can somebody help me tame this demon
(This devil, this devil)

Can’t beat this devil
So many times I’ve tried
It is out of control
Can someone help me through this scuffle
I can’t manage myself

So what if you can see the wildest side of me?
Don’t hope that you can alter this devil, so long subdued
Please persuade me, it’s an illusion
Can somebody help me tame the devil I released
Please persuade me, it’s an illusion
Can somebody help me tame this demon

Can someone get me through this scuffle
I can’t manage myself
Can someone throw me through this scuffle
I can’t beat these instincts

So what if you can see the wildest side of me?
Don’t hope that you can alter this devil, so long subdued
Please persuade me, it’s an illusion
Can somebody help me tame the devil I released
Please persuade me, it’s an illusion
Can somebody help me tame this demon

The devil I released

Answer 2

@superteenblue

Answer 3

what?

Answer 4

Could you give me some feedback on this piece. Like anything that looks like it should be fixed

Answer 5

it... ok it nothing its nice

Answer 6

Okay. Thank you for the help

Answer 7

welcome