Question

Hey guys so I'm writing a song for my bsf paris cuz she asked if I wanted to and it's for someone rlly close to her and I want to know what you all think..... I'm posting it in the comments.... just lmk if u wanna check it out and maybe give a couple of suggestions?

Answer 1

Make it cute or beautiful

Answer 2

Verse one:
I got the news you were joining the army
Took me by surprise
I always knew you were a good person deep down inside
Truth be told, I never expected this (Ooh)
You’re a thousand miles away
And I’m all alone
Wishing you were here
But if you’re listening I hope you know
That I never wanted you to walk this road alone
But now that you’re gone I don’t wanna move on
(ooh)
Chorus:
You’re already gone but it feels like you never left
Cuz you still have my heart and I have no regrets
You're the only one I'll ever have
And yeah I know it's a little too late
And I've made a lot of mistakes
But I hope you'll believe me when I say
Out of all the guys in the world
You're the only one
You're the only one
Verse 2:
I still remember the day
You sat down beside me
I said that I was a mistake
but you said I was you're one and only
Now things have changed

(that's all I have, for rn pls lmk if I need to add anything or give suggestions)

Answer 3

Nice Job 100/100

Answer 4

any suggestions?

Answer 5

Nope

Answer 6

its good tbh

Answer 7

Add something about dying 👐

Answer 8

Its good the way it is

Answer 9

I think it's really great and I cannot wait to see the finished piece! I think you should write songs more often!

Answer 10

this gave me chills this is so good

Answer 11

Add something like shes gotten you through your darkest times or about supporting her in some way

Answer 12

Or how much your gonna miss her