So, my friend and I are writing a story and I am writing the guy part because she doesn't want to. How is it so far:
I walked onto the set and realized that it’s been a while since I’ve seen any of this. All of the memories came flooding back, the good ones and the bad ones. The ones about the fake zombies and the ones about Kate. I’d still prefer the ones about the zombies than the ones about Kate. I saw a short but well-held, purple-haired wonder walking around the set.
“Hello, welcome to the set, Miss Gray,” I said in a voice that I hoped didn't sound too childish.
“Hello, Mr…” She paused. I forgot to tell her my name.
“Teague, Owen Teague,” I replied, politely. “I was in the first movie when I was a kid.” Worst and best decision I ever made.
She blushed. “I know. I'm a big fan of yours.”
I smiled at her and watched her all but melt into her shoes. I never understood why females react like this towards me.
“I’m glad you’re a fan. Do you want a picture or something?” I said, my smile turning into a full grin.
As she pondered on how to answer, I decided to study her. I saw the way she twirled her hair around her two forefingers as she bit her lip, trying to decide if I was serious or not.
“What?” She sounded surprised.
“Do you want a picture?” I repeated, wondering if I wasn't loud enough the first time I asked. “It's okay if you say no.”
“No no no no.... I would love that,” She smiled a dazzling smile and looked down.
“Okay,” I smiled at her.
She got her phone out and gave it to me to take the picture. I put my arm around her and just that small touch made me feel like something passed between us. Sparks. As we took the picture, I couldn't stop myself from imagining picking her up and spinning her around, then setting her down and planting a kiss on her full lips. The visual was so strong that I had to close my eyes.
I held her phone over her head, just above her reach.
“Come on!! Give me my phone back.” She pretended to be stern about it.

Question

So, my friend and I are writing a story and I am writing the guy part because she doesn't want to. How is it so far: 
I walked onto the set and realized that it’s been a while since I’ve seen any of this. All of the memories came flooding back, the good ones and the bad ones. The ones about the fake zombies and the ones about Kate. I’d still prefer the ones about the zombies than the ones about Kate. I saw a short but well-held, purple-haired wonder walking around the set.
	“Hello, welcome to the set, Miss Gray,” I said in a voice that I hoped didn't sound too childish.
	“Hello, Mr…” She paused. I forgot to tell her my name.
	“Teague, Owen Teague,” I replied, politely. “I was in the first movie when I was a kid.” Worst and best decision I ever made.
	She blushed. “I know. I'm a big fan of yours.”
I smiled at her and watched her all but melt into her shoes. I never understood why females react like this towards me.
“I’m glad you’re a fan. Do you want a picture or something?” I said, my smile turning into a full grin.
As she pondered on how to answer, I decided to study her. I saw the way she twirled her hair around her two forefingers as she bit her lip, trying to decide if I was serious or not.
“What?” She sounded surprised.
“Do you want a picture?” I repeated, wondering if I wasn't loud enough the first time I asked. “It's okay if you say no.”
“No no no no.... I would love that,” She smiled a dazzling smile and looked down.
“Okay,” I smiled at her. 
She got her phone out and gave it to me to take the picture. I put my arm around her and just that small touch made me feel like something passed between us. Sparks. As we took the picture, I couldn't stop myself from imagining picking her up and spinning her around, then setting her down and planting a kiss on her full lips. The visual was so strong that I had to close my eyes.
I held her phone over her head, just above her reach.
“Come on!! Give me my phone back.” She pretended to be stern about it.

ILOVESPAGHETTI · Answer

This is really good! Vivid language and good grammar! Good job.

XxMimiXx · Answer

omgg I love itttt lol and I'm so into romance novels and movies😂 hopefully I will be able to read more ♥️🦋

itsagirlthang · Answer

love it all the way👍

MusicGeek · Answer

@xxmimixx wrote:

omgg I love itttt lol and I'm so into romance novels and movies😂 hopefully I will be able to read more ♥️🦋

If you want, I can send you what my friend wrote so far.

MusicGeek · Answer

@itsagirlthang wrote:

love it all the way👍

Thanks

itsagirlthang · Answer

and please dont stop writing i wanna know what happens next

YRJ8498 · Answer

Yea this is pretty good

babygirlXOXO · Answer

love it

MusicGeek · Answer

@itsagirlthang wrote:

and please dont stop writing i wanna know what happens next

when we finish it, ill post the whole thing.

YRJ8498 · Answer

took me awhile to read it
but that's just me

XxMimiXx · Answer

@musicgeek wrote:

@xxmimixx wrote:

omgg I love itttt lol and I'm so into romance novels and movies😂 hopefully I will be able to read more ♥️🦋

If you want, I can send you what my friend wrote so far.

yess plzzz😊

MusicGeek · Answer

@xxmimixx wrote:

@musicgeek wrote:

@xxmimixx wrote:

omgg I love itttt lol and I'm so into romance novels and movies😂 hopefully I will be able to read more ♥️🦋

If you want, I can send you what my friend wrote so far.

yess plzzz😊

ill dm it to u

XxMimiXx · Answer

@musicgeek wrote:

@xxmimixx wrote:

@musicgeek wrote:

@xxmimixx wrote:

omgg I love itttt lol and I'm so into romance novels and movies😂 hopefully I will be able to read more ♥️🦋

If you want, I can send you what my friend wrote so far.

yess plzzz😊

ill dm it to u

ok sounds good

itsagirlthang · Answer

👌

liatartt · Answer

cool! B)

babygurlbella · Answer

I love it its really good keep up the good work

Astro · Answer

its actually really good

Astro · Answer

keep up the great writing, I can't wait to see more

Monicaiswriting246 · Answer

i like it, the idea and grammar of it is great!

summermorgan · Answer

very interesting. i would like to read more of it.