What do you guys think about this essay?

Question

ItzJayla · Answer

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ItzJayla · Answer

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Rayyyyyy · Answer

hm, well it seems pretty good, but is it only supposed to be 4 paragraphs long? i love how you worded things, but there are some parts that could be worded a bit differently.  For example "Toys help use imagination and people of every age have an imagination", could be worded as "Toys play a vital role in igniting someone's imagination, no matter how old they may seem". See how you still get your point across and you also sound more intelligent? it helps make an impression on your reader, and a positive on at that.

ItzJayla · Answer

@rayyyyyy wrote:

hm, well it seems pretty good, but is it only supposed to be 4 paragraphs long? i love how you worded things, but there are some parts that could be worded a bit differently. For example "Toys help use imagination and people of every age have an imagination", could be worded as "Toys play a vital role in igniting someone's imagination, no matter how old they may seem". See how you still get your point across and you also sound more intelligent? it helps make an impression on your reader, and a positive on at that.

Oh, yes, it is supposed to be four paragraphs long. It's a short mock ACT one but the ACT will be longer. Thank you for the suggestion and feedback. It will help a lot. :]

Rayyyyyy · Answer

Ah okay, just making sure lol. You're welcome, and i hope it helps!!

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