Wrote a song but not feeling it - advice? Criticism is welcome.

In a world that's always changing
Faces come and go, rearranging
But one thing that stays the same
Is the beat of my heart and your name

You light up my world with your love
Every moment with you is a treasure from above
With you, I feel like I can conquer anything
Together, our love will always keep on singing

Every moment with you is a delight
With you, everything just feels so right
From the mountains to the sea
You're the only one who truly sees me

Let's hold on to this feeling so strong
And together, we'll dance and we'll sing all night long
Our love will shine brighter than the stars above
Forever and always, you and I will be in love

You light up my world with your love
Every moment with you is a treasure from above
With you, I feel like I can conquer anything
Together, our love will always keep on singing

So let's keep this love burning bright
And hold on to each other through the night
'Cause you and me, we're meant to be
Together, forever and always, you'll see

Question

Wrote a song but not feeling it - advice? Criticism is welcome.

In a world that's always changing
Faces come and go, rearranging
But one thing that stays the same
Is the beat of my heart and your name

You light up my world with your love
Every moment with you is a treasure from above
With you, I feel like I can conquer anything
Together, our love will always keep on singing

Every moment with you is a delight
With you, everything just feels so right
From the mountains to the sea
You're the only one who truly sees me

Let's hold on to this feeling so strong
And together, we'll dance and we'll sing all night long
Our love will shine brighter than the stars above
Forever and always, you and I will be in love

You light up my world with your love
Every moment with you is a treasure from above
With you, I feel like I can conquer anything
Together, our love will always keep on singing

So let's keep this love burning bright
And hold on to each other through the night
'Cause you and me, we're meant to be
Together, forever and always, you'll see

QuestionCoveBot · Answer

Personally I don't really like

"You light up my world with your love
Every moment with you is a treasure from above
With you, I feel like I can conquer anything
Together, our love will always keep on singing"

Would love feedback on this particular part.

mayathegamergrl · Answer

tbh im not good with lyrics but i think the part that is off on that line might be "with you, i feel like i can conquer anything" to me it seems like "conquer" should be a different word, maybe im wrong tho

Tyrun · Answer

Love it

Tyrun · Answer

W song

thatgirlcrazy · Answer

@mayathegamergrl wrote:

tbh im not good with lyrics but i think the part that is off on that line might be "with you, i feel like i can conquer anything" to me it seems like "conquer" should be a different word, maybe im wrong tho

the best would be achieve or do anything

NotLeiland · Answer

Im not sure what you think is wrong here. I think it's great! 👍

thatgirlcrazy · Answer

@thatgirlcrazy wrote:

@mayathegamergrl wrote:

tbh im not good with lyrics but i think the part that is off on that line might be "with you, i feel like i can conquer anything" to me it seems like "conquer" should be a different word, maybe im wrong tho

the best would be achieve or do anything

Astrid1 · Answer

Ooh y ay you finally posted it!! Still so good <33

Tyrun · Answer

Facts

Soccerlover4life · Answer

OMG love it how'ed you get that insperation??!

QuestionCoveBot · Answer

@soccerlover4life wrote:

OMG love it how'ed you get that insperation??!

It’s a long story. Most of it came from previous songs and some other things.

Soccerlover4life · Answer

ok

QuestionCoveBot · Answer

@mayathegamergrl wrote:

tbh im not good with lyrics but i think the part that is off on that line might be "with you, i feel like i can conquer anything" to me it seems like "conquer" should be a different word, maybe im wrong tho

Yeah, I don’t really like the bridge part at all.

QuestionCoveBot · Answer

@notleiland wrote:

Im not sure what you think is wrong here. I think it's great! 👍

The bridge and everything else doesn’t exactly fit together

euphoriiic · Answer

ahh, I love it so much! you did a really good jobbb ellaaa

QuestionCoveBot · Answer

@euphoriiic wrote:

ahh, I love it so much! you did a really good jobbb ellaaa

Thank youuuu

madz2345 · Answer

I love ittttt. You did a great job :0
I really like the end part. Its so sweet and lovely! Your talented ma'am. I would give you donuts but ion got any left, smh. Ill rob a donut bank 4 u, ma'am.
Keep up the great amazingly perfect workkkk<3
^-^

QuestionCoveBot · Answer

@madz2345 wrote:

I love ittttt. You did a great job :0 I really like the end part. Its so sweet and lovely! Your talented ma'am. I would give you donuts but ion got any left, smh. Ill rob a donut bank 4 u, ma'am. Keep up the great amazingly perfect workkkk<3 ^-^

Thank you madzzzz

Marlin24k · Answer

That's amazing!