Question

ay can u guys check my essay. i wanna see ur opinion so far :3

Answer 1

Newcomer Schools And Why They Are Good
Have you ever wondered why there are newcomer schools? A newcomer school is for immigrants. Newcomer schools are different from normal schools. Newcomer schools are especially for immigrants from different parts of the world that are learning how to speak English and not in their normal surroundings. Newcomer schools are wonderful because they help immigrants have a better chance at graduating and it helps immigrants to meet different people and learn different cultures!
We have newcomer schools because it helps the rate for immigrants graduate. Evidence shows that, “According to a recent study looking at English Language Learners over four years in New York City, International High School students Graduate at a higher percentage than ELL students at other schools in the area (74% compared to approximately 31%)''Hauser, 22. So newcomer schools have a better chance of graduating for immigrants. Based on the evidence, newcomer schools are much better for an immigrant to graduate than normal schools. As you can see immigrants have a much bigger chance for graduating in a newcomer school than a normal school.
Newcomer schools have different cultures in them because of the immigrants from different parts of the world. The text shows “The students hail from 40-plus different countries and speak nearly 30 languages: Spanish, Creole, Arabic, Fulani and Tibetan, just to name a few.”(Hauser, 2) Based on the evidence there is an opportunity to learn not only English but other languages too! It is clear that newcomer schools have a lot more cutters than a normal school.
On the other hand some people might think that normal schools are better for immigrants because it might help them learn English better. This claim fails to recognize that it can and will be extremely intimidating for immigrants to go to a normal school. If you are an immigrant still learning English and everyone speaks to you in English then that will be very stressful.
Evidence shows that “Learning a new language is hard enough, but English is just one part of what these students must conquer as new immigrants in America.” (Hauser, 6). Based on the evidence, English is just one part of what immigrants have to do to be an American. If it was hard enough to be in a place where you can understand anyone can be stressful. But in a newcomer school you will be surrounded by people in the same place you are and that won't make you feel alone. It is clear that newcomer schools can help immigrants learn English with other people and not feel alone.

Answer 2

do good!

Answer 3

great!

Answer 4

"Based on the evidence, newcomer schools are much better for an immigrant to graduate than normal schools. As you can see immigrants have a much bigger chance for graduating in a newcomer school than a normal school."
Repetition like this isn't needed.

Answer 5

your essay is amazing so far ! , I think you should repeat a lot of words and try to say things differently, In your first paragraph, there were a lot of repeats of "newcomer school(s)" and "immigrants", in your writing it shows a lot of confidence, and I love what your writing about it shows how much people in the world care for new people experiencing new things in life, you did an amazing job !!! .

Answer 6

her ** .

Answer 7

You said "On the other hand some people might think that normal schools are better for immigrants because it might help them learn English better."
After saying "Newcomer schools are especially for immigrants from different parts of the world that are learning how to speak English"
which is kinda hypocritical

Answer 8

generally... fine... but needs some heavy revision

Answer 9

thank u all :0