This is the math joke thread.

Post your favorite math jokes here, if it's too nerdy you may post a short explanation.

Question

This is the math joke thread.

Post your favorite math jokes here, if it's too nerdy you may post a short explanation.

anonymous · Answer

pi to i: Get real!
i to pi : Get rational!

anonymous · Answer

http://www.google.co.in/imgres?imgurl=http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_GVA115I1I8Y/TMGvheoH6LI/AAAAAAAABHk/rpDitzk-_9M/s400/math-jokes-find-x-here-it-is.jpg&imgrefurl=http://tetrahedral.blogspot.com/2011/07/math-jokes.html&h=310&w=394&sz=11&tbnid=680XcQfaztc0sM:&tbnh=90&tbnw=114&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dmaths%2Bjokes%26tbm%3Disch%26tbo%3Du&zoom=1&q=maths+jokes&docid=kdr5ZVvqMNIChM&hl=en&sa=X&ei=tlf7TuPTMozMrQeJ5fCyAg&sqi=2&ved=0CCwQ9QEwAQ&dur=1998 The best thing i saw laughed a lot when i first saw it

anonymous · Answer

I found this one:


Q: Why do motorcycle gang members use their motorcycles to get to work?

A: Because members of cyclical groups commute.

anonymous · Answer

Q: Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?
A: Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don't need the sun!

anonymous · Answer

And another one same as first dude actually these are from fb no offense i googled it now http://www.google.co.in/imgres?imgurl=http://www.noob.us/images/math1.gif&imgrefurl=http://www.noob.us/pictures/funny-math-jokes-and-equations/&h=284&w=378&sz=9&tbnid=MHRbh16hp4KT0M:&tbnh=90&tbnw=120&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dmaths%2Bjokes%26tbm%3Disch%26tbo%3Du&zoom=1&q=maths+jokes&docid=Jw7NSUMenW01NM&hl=en&sa=X&ei=tlf7TuPTMozMrQeJ5fCyAg&sqi=2&ved=0CDIQ9QEwAw&dur=1053

mr.math · Answer

$i$ is neither rational nor real! He shouldn't be talking!

anonymous · Answer

http://static.themetapicture.com/media/funny-Bill-Cosby-sin-tan-math.jpg

karatechopper · Answer

http://www.mathfail.com/infinite-bar-math-joke.jpg

anonymous · Answer

Theorem: A cat has nine tails.
Proof: No cat has eight tails. Since one cat has one more tail than no cat, it must have nine tails.

anonymous · Answer

Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x].

anonymous · Answer

Another cool one guys http://www.google.co.in/imgres?q=maths+jokes&hl=en&safe=off&sa=X&biw=1138&bih=531&tbm=isch&prmd=imvns&tbnid=_CY2zn0kjhk41M:&imgrefurl=http://bettasplenden-bettasplenden.blogspot.com/2011/01/math-jokes.html&docid=-GE0Kx9PC4vZjM&imgurl=http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_wKLtUH_WJAo/TTxb4jC9eEI/AAAAAAAAAu0/mFHnpTaZhTk/s1600/math%252Bjoke.JPG&w=960&h=720&ei=olj7TobFOMzprQef8YnsDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=721&vpy=122&dur=399&hovh=190&hovw=259&tx=116&ty=129&sig=103045282814087572097&page=1&tbnh=162&tbnw=258&start=0&ndsp=10&ved=1t:429,r:8,s:0

anonymous · Answer

They say mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.

mr.math · Answer

LOL @Diya. That bartender surely knows how to find a geometric sum! :P

zarkon · Answer

I've always liked ...

Three employees (an engineer, a physicist and a mathematician) are staying in a hotel while attending a technical seminar. 
The engineer wakes up and smells smoke. He goes out into the hallway and sees a fire, so he fills a trashcan from his room with water and douses the fire. He goes back to bed. 
Later, the physicist wakes up and smells smoke. He opens his door and sees a fire in the hallway. He walks down the hall to a fire hose and after calculating the flame velocity, distance, water pressure, trajectory, etc. extinguishes the fire with the minimum amount of water and energy needed. 
Later, the mathematician wakes up and smells smoke. She goes to the hall, sees the fire and then the fire hose. She thinks for a moment and then exclaims, 'Ah, a solution exists!' and then goes back to bed.

karatechopper · Answer

tht was me yall!

karatechopper · Answer

zank u^

anonymous · Answer

Not strictly maths but...
 A graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
 A graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
 A graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
 A graduate with a Law degree asks, "Who gave it a permission to work?"
 A graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Would you like fries with that?"

anonymous · Answer

Spiked math is cool :D

anonymous · Answer

Here are the hot jokes: http://spikedmath.com/hot.html

asnaseer · Answer

An Indian chief had three daughters who were given permission to marry three braves, who had to provide  tepees for their brides.  The first brave placed a deerskin on the floor of the tepee he built, the second used a buffalo hide, and the third (who was a world traveler) used the hide of a hippopotamus.  Nine months after the three marriages had occurred, the first wife had a baby boy, the second wife had a baby boy, and the third wife had twin boys.

What famous mathematical theorem is stated here?

karatechopper · Answer

this is joke man not lateral thinking time!

asnaseer · Answer

the sons of the squaws on the two hides must equal the sons of the squaw on the hippopotamus.

karatechopper · Answer

squaw?

anonymous · Answer

@FSM: http://spikedmath.com/447.html :D ;)

karatechopper · Answer

this is too nerdy explanation

asnaseer · Answer

@karatechopper - squaw == wife of red indian

karatechopper · Answer

o

mr.math · Answer

LOL! Is that all we're gonna get? @FFM

anonymous · Answer

Hahahaha! @FFM and @asnaseer. Euclid.

asnaseer · Answer

What did the zero say to the the eight?

asnaseer · Answer

Nice belt!

mr.math · Answer

I dunno! 8 is two zeros, one on top of the other! :P

mr.math · Answer

lol!

anonymous · Answer

@Mr.Math: Never let the secret out :P

asnaseer · Answer

What is the difference between a Ph.D. in mathematics and a large pizza?

anonymous · Answer

Only in math is it perfectly normal to have 50 apples on your person.

asnaseer · Answer

A large pizza can feed a family of four.

anonymous · Answer

This is for you diya: http://spikedmath.com/434.html

asnaseer · Answer

Mathematicians never die ...

asnaseer · Answer

... - they only loose some of their functions.

anonymous · Answer

.. they just disintegrate ?

asnaseer · Answer

:-D

anonymous · Answer

.. they just lose their identities :D

anonymous · Answer

.. they just pass into another field?

mr.math · Answer

I love your jokes asnaseer! :D

anonymous · Answer

.. they just tend to infinity.?

asnaseer · Answer

Where can you buy a ruler that is 3 feet long?

asnaseer · Answer

At a yard sale.

anonymous · Answer

ansaseer's jokes are definitely the best.

asnaseer · Answer

thx guys :-)

anonymous · Answer

BUUUT everyone else's are hilarious too ;)

asnaseer · Answer

Here's one for all you drinkers out there...

Never show a bar chart at an AA meeting.

anonymous · Answer

Yeah his one-linere is  mot juste, and bon mot :D

anonymous · Answer

Statistics show that teenage pregnancies drop off significantly after age 25.

anonymous · Answer

This is so true: http://spikedmath.com/418.html :D :D

anonymous · Answer

Beware cheaters: http://spikedmath.com/412.html :D

asnaseer · Answer

An infinite crowd of mathematicians enters a bar. 
The first one orders a pint, the second one a half pint, the third one a quarter pint...

anonymous · Answer

A team of engineers were required to measure the height of a flag pole. They only had a measuring tape, and were getting quite frustrated trying to keep the tape along the pole. It kept falling down, etc. A mathematician comes along, finds out their problem, and proceeds to remove the pole from the ground and measure it easily. When he leaves, one engineer says to the other: "Just like a mathematician! We need to know the height, and he gives us the length!"

anonymous · Answer

http://www.google.co.in/imgres?q=maths+jokes&hl=en&safe=off&sa=X&biw=1138&bih=531&tbm=isch&prmd=imvns&tbnid=UDHNHI2RwfPQTM:&imgrefurl=http://mathspig.wordpress.com/tag/end-of-year-math-joke/&docid=7hFQv_b0U7Ua7M&imgurl=http://mathspig.files.wordpress.com/2010/11/6-pizza-math-mathfail.png%253Fw%253D450&w=400&h=354&ei=olj7TobFOMzprQef8YnsDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=186&vpy=236&dur=2113&hovh=211&hovw=239&tx=154&ty=129&sig=103045282814087572097&page=6&tbnh=143&tbnw=162&start=55&ndsp=11&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:55

asnaseer · Answer

"I understand", says the bartender - and pours two pints.

anonymous · Answer

@FSM: http://spikedmath.com/389.html

karatechopper · Answer

i already did tht joke but it was with cups

anonymous · Answer

Hahahahah @FFM. Spikedmath is very funny.

anonymous · Answer

Yeah :D

mr.math · Answer

@asnaseer: We would appreciate if you delete the questions that do not match the standards on the Meta-math group, since you're the moderator there! :)

asnaseer · Answer

I can do that?
Wouldn't it more polite to just ask the questioners to stop doing it?

anonymous · Answer

@Mr.Math:This is math joke thread and see I am not laughing :P

mr.math · Answer

It would be more polite, yeah! You may do that if you think it's better. But I think that TurningTest has already asked him that.

mr.math · Answer

You should probably go and see for yourself! :)

mr.math · Answer

Sorry Fool for using your thread! :P

asnaseer · Answer

ok - let me take a look - although I prefer staying here to enjoy the humour :-(

mr.math · Answer

No one will take your seat, I'll keep an eye on it! ;)

anonymous · Answer

@asnaseer: you are a  lady?

anonymous · Answer

Several scientists were all posed the following question: "What is pi ?" 
The engineer said: "It is approximately 3 and 1/7" 
The physicist said: "It is 3.14159" 
The mathematician thought a bit, and replied "It is equal to pi".

asnaseer · Answer

@FoolForMath - no - at least not since the last time I checked! ;-)