i need opinions....

poem 1

sun sets n' sun rises
this moment locked in time
my breath stops
our eyes lock
your heart beats next to mine
the ground shakes
my body shivers
it feels like total bliss
i have all over tingles
for this is my first kiss

Question

i need opinions....

poem 1

sun sets n' sun rises 
this moment locked in time
my breath stops 
our eyes lock 
your heart beats next to mine
the ground shakes 
my body shivers
it feels like total bliss
i have all over tingles 
for this is my first kiss

anonymous · Answer

Sounds beautiful!

anonymous · Answer

thanks its the first poem i ever wrote lol

anonymous · Answer

awww I like it

anonymous · Answer

thanks:D

anonymous · Answer

It's awesome. Good job! :)

anonymous · Answer

I. wuv. it!!!! ^-^ **clapps** props 2you chica!!  :j

anonymous · Answer

Very nice an very detailed i love it for a first poem its great you should teach me how to write poems lol.

anonymous · Answer

thanks guys lol and if you want me to help you just PM me a poem your working on and i can help you

anonymous · Answer

Love it!

anonymous · Answer

I really liked it! (I would say I loved it, but loving stuff is overused and overrated) The tempo is nice and the internal rhythm is perfect, too.

anonymous · Answer

thanks and i agree love is over used sometimes lol