Question

Here are 2 more poems let me know what you think please.

*I am waiting*
Come to me, love me,
you were always 'my own'.
Renouncing all others,
you were just mine alone.
So come, I am calling
From God's Heaven above.
I can't hear you,
I can't see you.
But I am waiting, my love.

*It Will Stay*
I wrote your name in the sky,
but the wind blew it away.
I wrote your name in the sand,
but the waves washed it away.
I wrote your name in my heart,
and forever it will stay.

Answer 1

The only advice that I would give would be to perhaps use more creative adjectives, or imaginative wording. Part of the fun of language is that it doesn't always have to be literal. Thinking outside the box and all that.

Answer 2

Thanks for the advice I will implement that into my poems in the future.

Answer 3

Woahh they are both really good
but i like the second one better
great job :)

Answer 4

thankyou

Answer 5

First poem is written by Joyce Hemsley. Second written by Jessica Blade.

Answer 6

believe whatever all i know is i wrote this about a year ago