Question

Critique my poem? :)
(in comments)

Answer 1

Winter winds whistling whipping through your hair


circling diving screaming howling in the air


banshees wailing with a knife-sharp scream


shattering hope and song and dream


tearing through your skin and leaving you raw


gathering the world in their sharp-toothed maw


chill pervades your very soul

terror and tremors swallow you whole

skeleton-thin you feel alone

and then the phantoms start to moan

fear turns to sorrow and darkness and cold

ghosts gather round you as your soul starts to mold

decaying and desiccated rotting death

why should you bother to take another breath


and then the snow starts to fall and blankets the ground


softly sighing and whispering ‘round


gentle as moondust it falls on your skin



as you are slowly reborn again

Answer 2

The only critical comment that I can conjure with regards to you poem is that there is a lack of proper punctuation. Other than that, it looks great. Good job.

Answer 3

The poem is great, but its lacking is punctuation like @geneticrockhopper247 said.

Answer 4

I did that deliberately, actually. But thanks! ^_^

Answer 5

i like it

Answer 6

Thanks ^_^

Answer 7

I like it alot! (I think if you changed Knife-sharp to something else it would sound better)

Answer 8

Thank you! :)
Do you have any suggestions at to what to change it to?

Answer 9

blade strong

Answer 10

Banshees ripping out wails sharp as a blade?

Answer 11

Hmm, I dunno. I'll think about it, thanks. :)

Answer 12

It's amazing! Perfect amount of detail as well! Not too much, but not too little

Answer 13

maybe...banshees wailing with a piercing scream

Answer 14

Thank you, Sammi! And that's a good suggestion, Tjbrew :)

Answer 15

its scary

Answer 16

I know ^_^

Answer 17

i think its BEAUTIFUL

Answer 18

Thanks :)