I feel like there is this weight on me I can't pin it down and it's drowning me. It sends me further under and I don't know what to do all I can do is smile and play it cool but when it crushes me completely what am I to do? Will I still smile and wave and pretend everything is fine or will I let this weight bury me alive? Will I let my pain be known or will I stay and sit in silence? What will become of me if I stay in silence? I do not wish to be a hero only to help those in need.

( I was inspired to make this by my tia she helped me talk about my problems. I need a title for this and I want to make a group of stories or poems like this. Is there anything I should improve?)

Question

I feel like there is this weight on me I can't pin it down and it's drowning me. It sends me further under and I don't know what to do all I can do is smile and play it cool but when it crushes me completely what am I to do? Will I still smile and wave and pretend everything is fine or will I let this weight bury me alive? Will I let my pain be known or will I stay and sit in silence? What will become of me if I stay in silence? I do not wish to be a hero only to help those in need.

( I was inspired to make this by my tia she helped me talk about my problems. I need a title for this and I want to make a group of stories or poems like this. Is there anything I should improve?)

Laya24 · Answer

I am in need of a title and some suggestions on what to fix or improve any ideas for more poems like this one?

axie · Answer

Rocks and ropes would be a good title

LILBOY · Answer

i like it 
u got dat shii on lock ngl

LILBOY · Answer

https://www.bandlab.com/post/7e45b346-ea6f-ee11-9937-000d3a41ec2a lmk how it is

Jeremana73 · Answer

I would include line breaks to visualize the rhyme and alliteration
Real good writing