Question

heres my life (story short) 16 yrs old
since i was a little kid ive been getting in-trouble most my life has been spent getting yelleed at for hat i did o sitting on my bed or just being"grounded" which yes all is my fault but recently in the past 3 years ive been getting kicked out or just running away i came back home after 3 months at my frinds house and now im home they caught me with 3 pre-rolls and a lighter and i was faded ion know if my dad told my mom yet or if he did but my mom said she almost dont want me in her house which is tuff cuz i just came back but i feel bad for them bc i dont have self control so i cant just decide not to do somthing and i guess i could but then i cant bc i convince myself to do what i want and thats what gets me introuble its like im self aware and dont do anything abt it bc i dont know why but point is if i get kicked out ima have to go to the crib in the hood n once i go there i cant go back n ill grow into a hood mf then who know wha ill do like thas the only thing i be afraid for. ORRR im overthinking rn idk