Life Changes sos (poem) *not finsihed*

Right now, life is boring, no longer tame, life is getting more and more a burden. If I could go back to little me life would be just great. I’d be so joyful, smiling, laughing, singing and worshiping whenever a Jesus song comes on, asking mama and dad questions with curiosity with a sparkle in my eye… But now I’m just faking it to make it, only laughing and smiling around my “friends” most the time, trying to smile so they don’t ask what’s wrong or ask me if I’m ok, needing to have my eyebrows lifted a bit just so people don’t think I’m mad or sad, having mood swings, crying at night in agony, feeling like I’m drowning from time to time, hard to know my emotions, trying to hold my tears back with a lump in my throat, thinking to myself wondering why I get left out so much, no one understands me, not even myself, why do people tend to tell me to go away so much I don’t understand, even my own “friends” leave me out… wondering why I’m so judgmental towards the people I don’t even know, I don’t know a thing about them but I’ll judge… I hate that I do that… I hate that I’m such a mess up all the time… I never stop running my mouth.. I don’t understand why.. whenever someone asks me how’s life going I always say its going just great with a big smile.. its all fake.. I don’t know how to feel a lot of the times.. just always being confused why I’m like this.. I sometimes call out to God I feel he doesn’t hear me to well.. but he could also just be waiting for me to give up completely… I’m afraid I can’t give up just yet.. I was made for something right? I have a huge purpose… lots of Jesus followers have told me.. I’ve slowly drifted from God.. I want to go back but its hard knowing that my mama and dad are never there for me… but hey, at least I got my nana.. I might not have her for long.. I hope my big brother doesn’t leave me behind when he turns 18.. nana might not still be here and well I’ll just be all alone not knowing what to do.. scared, begging, pleading God to help me out of the water I’m drowning.. I’m getting to far down.. Is it going to be hard for him to get me out?... I hope not I’ll just be drowning and drowning for eternity…

Question

Life Changes sos (poem) *not finsihed*

Right now, life is boring, no longer tame, life is getting more and more a burden. If I could go back to little me life would be just great. I’d be so joyful, smiling, laughing, singing and worshiping whenever a Jesus song comes on, asking mama and dad questions with curiosity with a sparkle in my eye… But now I’m just faking it to make it, only laughing and smiling around my “friends” most the time, trying to smile so they don’t ask what’s wrong or ask me if I’m ok, needing to have my eyebrows lifted a bit just so people don’t think I’m mad or sad, having mood swings, crying at night in agony, feeling like I’m drowning from time to time, hard to know my emotions, trying to hold my tears back with a lump in my throat, thinking to myself wondering why I get left out so much, no one understands me, not even myself, why do people tend to tell me to go away so much I don’t understand, even my own “friends” leave me out… wondering why I’m so judgmental towards the people I don’t even know, I don’t know a thing about them but I’ll judge… I hate that I do that… I hate that I’m such a mess up all the time… I never stop running my mouth.. I don’t understand why.. whenever someone asks me how’s life going I always say its going just great with a big smile.. its all fake.. I don’t know how to feel a lot of the times.. just always being confused why I’m like this.. I sometimes call out to God I feel he doesn’t hear me to well.. but he could also just be waiting for me to give up completely… I’m afraid I can’t give up just yet.. I was made for something right? I have a huge purpose… lots of Jesus followers have told me.. I’ve slowly drifted from God.. I want to go back but its hard knowing that my mama and dad are never there for me… but hey, at least I got my nana.. I might not have her for long.. I hope my big brother doesn’t leave me behind when he turns 18.. nana might not still be here and well I’ll just be all alone not knowing what to do.. scared, begging, pleading God to help me out of the water I’m drowning.. I’m getting to far down.. Is it going to be hard for him to get me out?... I hope not I’ll just be drowning and drowning for eternity…

idontexistrn1 · Answer

um, not to be rude but u spelled finished wrong

SunFlower01 · Answer

@idontexistrn1 wrote:

um, not to be rude but u spelled finished wrong

ik i was typing to quickly

idontexistrn1 · Answer

@sunflower01 wrote:

@idontexistrn1 wrote:

um, not to be rude but u spelled finished wrong

ik i was typing to quickly

oh ok mb, it's rlly good otherwise

SunFlower01 · Answer

@idontexistrn1 wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

@idontexistrn1 wrote:

um, not to be rude but u spelled finished wrong

ik i was typing to quickly

oh ok mb, it's rlly good otherwise

eh just my feelings its easier for me to write them out .. but it takes a bit

Bot1 · Answer

amazing

SunFlower01 · Answer

@bot1 wrote:

amazing

thankss^^

uknownprttyfacekayla · Answer

I love it it’s amazing

SunFlower01 · Answer

@uknownprttyfacekayla wrote:

I love it it’s amazing

thank you so much ...

Shadyboy · Answer

Text me

Harmonic · Answer

✨

SunFlower01 · Answer

@harmonic wrote:

✨

🙀✨

SunFlower01 · Answer

@shadyboy wrote:

Text me

why

Alanaaaaaaa · Answer

it's well said maybe try not to type as fast though..

CherryLover · Answer

I like it

SunFlower01 · Answer

@alanaaaaaaa wrote:

it's well said maybe try not to type as fast though..

wdym how much did i mess up on?

SunFlower01 · Answer

@cherrylover wrote:

I like it

thanks

CherryLover · Answer

@sunflower01 wrote:

@cherrylover wrote:

I like it

thanks

yw

SunFlower01 · Answer

@cherrylover wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

@cherrylover wrote:

I like it

thanks

yw

^.^

marienne · Answer

i love it

SunFlower01 · Answer

@marienne wrote:

i love it

thanks ^.^

whoaminot · Answer

very good

euphoriiic · Answer

its rlly good

sllo · Answer

Oh so very good

SunFlower01 · Answer

@sllo wrote:

Oh so very good

thx

SunFlower01 · Answer

@euphoriiic wrote:

its rlly good

tysm

SunFlower01 · Answer

@whoaminot wrote:

very good

thanks

SunFlower01 · Answer

@shadyboy wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

@shadyboy wrote:

Text me

why

Unblock me

uhm

Harmonic · Answer

imposter

SunFlower01 · Answer

@shadyboy wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

why

@shadyboy wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

@shadyboy wrote:

Text me

why

Unblock me

uhm

Text me need to talk

SunFlower01 · Answer

@shadyboy wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

Text me im waiting

what do u need

SunFlower01 · Answer

@shadyboy wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

Unblock me

...

Shadyboy · Answer

Waiting for your text

Shadyboy · Answer

@sunflower01 wrote:

@shadyboy wrote:

@sunflower01 wrote:

Unblock me

...

Text me in private