Okay so I'm writing this story about a shooting in Brooklyn park and I have to tell why it affects me...I have my first and third paragraph but I don't have a second can someone help me with my second paragraph?

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anonymous · Answer

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anonymous · Answer

Ok first, I want you to look back over your paper...there are several grammar mistakes. Also you need to show, not tell...it'll make your paper sound better. Another thing is that "I guess" shouldn't be in this paper, if you researched something, you need to be sure of the information that you're giving. To give you a head start on your second paragraph, I think you should go into more detail about the homicide.

anonymous · Answer

oh okay then nd I know there are grammar mistakes and other stuff in the paper I do that at the end and go into to detail on the homicide like how? Should I talk about like the events leading up to the shooting?

anonymous · Answer

well go more into detail about the story...about what happened.....so yes,go more into the events leading to the shooting

anonymous · Answer

oh okay thank you @swimmergirl  you really helped

anonymous · Answer

:) you are very welcome! I'm glad I could help!