Question

Create your own story with a twist ending. Write a synopsis of the story up to the ending, and then fully develop the ending. Use at least three techniques that create suspense and a twist ending. Identify the techniques by labeling them.

Here's my story. Can someone tell me what I should change, not change, What I did wrong, how to fix it, what to elaborate on?

Answer 1

Where is your story?

Answer 2

I posted it but no one helped... here it is if you want to read it but i don't need help anymore

Answer 3

Synopsis: Sara finds out her boyfriend has been cheating on her. Ater a long drawn out search she finds out where he lives and blacks out.
Morgan watches the water drip from the faucet of the filthy bathroom. She sits in the corner farthest away from it. If she turned her head just an inch she could see the blood still spreading from the stall. She glances nervously from right to left wondering if the killer is still here. She catches a glimpse of a satiny black stiletto shoe sitting next to the stall. She knows it’s the killers but she can’t put her finger on why *.
The sound of a heal breaking. I take a moment and kick it off. It leaves me with a limp but I don’t mind. I can hear her in the stall. The feather. She thinks she can just get away with it? I’ll show her. We’ll show her.*
Morgan catches her breath. She glances to the sides again and feels bile rise to her throat. Clutched in the pale hand is a sizable chunk of black hair**. She can’t see the hair on its head. It’s blond.
I limp over to the sink across from the stall she's in. I catch a flash of yellow through the crack in the door. Bimbo. What did he see in her? My own beautiful black hair falls down my back in waves. Usually…It doesn’t right now. It’s quite tangled actually, and matted. His blood turns the ends sticky and spiky. I did that. Killed him I mean. The knife I slit his cheating throat with still sits in my hand. Morgan doesn’t know yet but she will. I’ll leave her in there with her- no with it. I’ve always helped Sara in the past, Doing her homework, cleaning her room, fighting her bullies.
A faint siren begins to reach Morgans ears. She’s so confused. She reaches a shaking hand to her hair, and pulls away bloody fingers. She stares at her hand startled. She replaces the hand and feels her way across the scalp. There’s no open wound but she has a pounding headache. She wishes the ringing in her head would go away, and then realizes it’s a siren. It must be the police. Morgan feels a rush of hope.
I turn as the stall opens. It looks at me in shock. I must look a mess what with my ripped, bloody dress but I don’t care. I don’t care about anything anymore, except it.I step smoothly forward and stab it. It makes the most beautiful noise halfway between a screech and a gurgle. I feel a belated pain in the back of my head. I feel around where the sting is coming from an feel a small bald spot. I still feel his blood but it’s sticky and old. I don’t feel any open wound but I now have a bad headache. It is sitting pathetically on the floor screaming. It stop screaming a minute later but my dress has a few more interesting stains on it. The sirens are getting louder, I have to hurry. I have to wake up Morgan. I spin around, throw the knife in the sink and rush towards the farthest corner of the bathroom. I sit down and glance around. I can’t see its head anymore but my hair is clearly visible in its hand. I look farther and see my shoe sitting near the first stall. I smile as the sirens get louder. I feel my eyes close and my mind relax, my body staying stiff waiting for Morgan to wake up and take over. Poor girl. She’s not gonna know what hit her. ***
*forshadowing
**Flashback/nonlinear naration
***unreliable narrator