Question

CAN SOMEONE EDIT ONE PARAGRAPH FOR ME TO MAKE IT SOUND BETTER, AND LONGER. PUT BETTER VOCAB, AND CORRECT GRAMATICAL ERRORS AND SENETCENCE CORRECTIONS?

Answer 1

Finally, forensic research was a major in college that few students chose to take part in, as for the CSI shows, many students now want to pursue their career in that field. As stated by Willings, many lawyers, judges and legal consultants say they appreciate how CSI-type shows have increased interest in forensic evidence.

Answer 2

Are you trying to say that there weren't very many college students who wanted to major in forensic research before the popularization of shows about crime scene investigators; and that because of those shows there are many more students pursuing that as a career?

Answer 3

Yes

Answer 4

Why do you start with "finally"?

Answer 5

Transitional phrase?

Answer 6

it's the last point in a larger paper? aah, that makes more sense ^^

", as for the CSI shows," that's a sentence fragment and also doesn't lead into the second half of that run-on sentence.

Letting it be something like "; however, because of CSI shows.." let's the second half of the sentence sentence counter what was originally set up. It could just be an outright new sentence, too. ^^

Answer 7

~second half of the sentence counter

Answer 8

Ah I see, it makes better sense!
do you mind proof reading my whole essay please?

Answer 9

sure

Answer 10

According to Richard Willings, who is the author of “The CSI Effect”, many crime shows, such as CSI, have had a profound influence on the way the court system handles cases. Scientific evidence is not only well respected throughout court cases, but has become a customary form of evidentiary support compared to previous forms of evidence. CSI shows made high-tech data something that should be expected in a court case. Through its popularity, CSI shows have made forensic studies popular throughout colleges across the world.
Since the start of the CSI television shows, the last factor considered has always been science. The CSI is adamant that science is the best way to figure out data and solve the case. But Willings stated that the television programs create illusion that criminal science is fast and infallible and always gets its man. This affects the way lawyers prepare their cases, as well as the expectations that the police and the public place on real crime labs. Real crime scene investigators say the delusive programs give people unrealistic ideas of the real CSI.
When people think of CSI the first thing that comes to mind is investigators in sunglasses and long dark trench coats, carrying clipboards and pens dealing with gory cases. There are some even too revolting for the general human's imagination. However, in the CSI show, Hollywood glamorizes the profession by adding high-tech labs and beautiful tech ladies, giving a clean, modern look to the profession.
Forensic research was a major in college that few students chose to take part in. However, for the CSI shows, many students now want to pursue their career in that field. As stated by Willings, many lawyers, judges and legal consultants say they appreciate how CSI-type shows have increased interest in forensic evidence. All across America, students are majoring in forensic studies due to the fact CSI shows have glamorized the lifestyle of CSI investigators and their circumstances.
CSI shows have made significant impacts on today’s court systems. Science is now required in a crime trial, and actually something worth discussing throughout one. High-tech data and the glamorous lab life portrayed in the show impacted on how people really think investigators work.

Answer 11

***************
unless you're referring specifically to the television program CSI or shows "like CSI," you should write out "crime scene investigators/investigating/investigations" *****************

"According to Richard Willings, the author of “The CSI Effect”, many crime shows (such as CSI) have had a profound...."


"Scientific evidence is not only well-respected throughout court cases, but has become the customary form of evidentiary support [(compared to previous forms of evidence) --- such as? Or just don't mention it]


"Through [their] popularity, CSI shows have made forensic studies popular [at / in] colleges across the world."


"Since the start [of television shows like CSI,] the last factor considered has always been science." awk

"[Though] CSI is adamant that science is the best way to [analyze] data and solve the case, Willings stated that [these] television programs create [the] illusion that criminal science is [fast, and infallible, and "always gets its man."] "


[ "Crime ]scene investigators say the delusive programs give people unrealistic ideas [about actual cases involving crime scene investigators]. '


"When people think [, "CSI,"] the first thing..."



"However, in the [show,] Hollywood glamorizes ..."



"However, [because of shows like CSI], many students now...."



"judges and legal consultants say they appreciate how [these types of] shows have"



"All across America, students are majoring in forensic studies due to the fact [that] CSI shows have glamorized lifestyle of CSI investigators and their circumstances." awk - TOOO MANY "CSI"'s AAA



"Science is now required in [criminal trials],"

" and actually something worth discussing throughout one." I don't know what this means


"High-tech data and the glamorous lab life portrayed in the show [ have impacted] how people really think investigators work [**for better? for worse? little a' both?] ].



There are LOTS of " CSI's " that need to be weeded out and/or pruned. Go through it and every time you see a "CSI" make it bold font size 20 and figure out how to change it up

^_^ ^_^ It's good though ^^

Answer 12

Thanks ^_^

Answer 13

welcome ^^ hope it helps!

Answer 14

@AllTehMaffs you did a lot of proof editing

Answer 15

she asked if I could proof read it.... :/

Answer 16

Well done and yes i know she did. I gave you a medal and that's sad that she didn't give you a medal

Answer 17

^_^ well thank you much! ^_^

Answer 18

:D