Question

Some days I can't handle the pain and wanna end my life. It hurts too much but yet I have this amazing friend who tries to help me and I just don't know how to accept his advice. He is the only person I can go to with my problems. He is amazing and everything, but idk if my craziness would make him just disappear.....
I am slowly breaking and feel like I don't deserve to be here at the moment. The feeling of losing my brother would hurt me. We have had our issues but he is my brother but I still love him.
I get super emotional after I talk to him on the phone cause he cries when talking to

Answer 1

me. I love my brother to death. I would do anything in the world for him.
I just need my friend more than anything in the world right now cause I can't do this alone.

Answer 2

@praetorian.10

Answer 3

I'm going to tell you something you've heard a thousand times, life gets better. Now I seriously want you to listen to it this time. That's all there is to it.

Answer 4

I know you probably already know your life is better than 99% of the world. If you have more than 1 pair of shoes is better than half the world. If you have more than 10 you're again in the top 1% so why are you so upset? I know it's not that simple but think about it. You've been blessed with a lot and I know it because you were able to get on the internet to ask post this. I guarantee you're problems will seem very minor later in your life. You'll wonder why you were so upset. What you seriously need to do is take a step back and evaluate why your life is like this, I know there's something you can change. Basically what I'm saying is that you need to try something different, because whatever you're doing now obviously isn't working. Even something as dumb as taking an art class, idk.

Answer 5

Not trying to sound rude but it is HIGHLY unlikely that anything has happened in your life that would make how you're feeling like this reasonable.

Answer 6

@PRAETORIAN.10 - she needz you~

Answer 7

But until then....

Surprisingly, I can relate to that... And I can provide empathy... I don't normally talk about my emotions, or crap that's happened to me, but I hope it can make you feel better to know you're not alone and can cope with stuff like that~

So Anyway~

Answer 8

Something "big" and "terrible" (or it seemed so at the time) happened here, and so my brother had to move out of our house. I was devastated. My brother and I were reaalllly close for a while, and it all just hit me hard, the world (it seemed) was going to come to an end. Why did all hurt me like I couldn't go on? I was so confused. I didn't eat anything. I didn't sleep for weeks. But in the mornings, I couldn't get out of bed. I isolated myself from the world and from everyone around me. I felt powerless, weak, helpless and every corner seemed darker than the first. I wanted it all to end. Nothing seemed to be able to distract me, friends threw parties, relatives got married, I became an aunt again, but I couldn't get that terrible thought out of my head: I wanted more than anything to die~

Answer 9

But I was patient... Surely things couldn't get any worse for me could they? Boy was I wrong. Because of another sibling, I lived that year like it was Hell on Earth~ And it hurt most, that it was all because of one of my other siblings - the one I had looked up to for so long - the one I learned so much from - the one I expected and wished to be like when I grew up... For personal reasons, I can't explain what she did, but it was just horrendous - anyone would want to end their life then and there... But I did something after my brother left, that I hadn't done in a long, very, very long time: I cried...

It helped me stay patient - it helped me let it ALL out.. sure it was to no one in particular, but I was releasing some of the sadness, anger, and confusion.. and it really was the sole reason I didn't end my own life.

Crying doesn't mean we're weak - it just means we've been strong for a long time~

Answer 10

But I learned so much from being that sad, and having gone through what i went through.. I've grown from it - I've matured, and I wouldn't take back a single one of those days because it's shaped me to become a stronger person - I saw and realized that I don't need someone to cope with things ~I felt great knowing that I got through it without anybody. Independent. I can't really say that it was all positive effects... had i continued on without sleep like that.. i would've eventually gotten insomnia..and food? Well let's just say i lost 30lbs. in 2 short months, and unfortunately, till this day - I see a nutritionist because of that - but I'm really thankful, things got better, ~Sure it was a bit of a nasty shock when he came and told us he'd been married for about 7 months and his wife was prego... but in a matter of weeks, we were discussing him coming back and living with us. I was ecstatic! And things just went smoothly from there...

So really, there IS light at the end of the tunnel~ and we just have to patient enough to reach it :3

Answer 11

I really hope you can prove to yourself that you're stronger than you think, and that you can overcome all of it *^-^

I hope that everything gets better and that you can be happy c:
<3

~Venus

Answer 12

Oh and-

Feel free to pm at ANY time ~

Answer 13

Thanks! I'm trying my hardest everyday to show that I am strong for my family. Its just hard when you hear another loved one on the phone saying "I love you so much" while he is crying.
All I need is a good boost from friends because I do not get that. My mother never talks to me about my brother cause its hard for her too.

Answer 14

You're Welcome *^-^

And I understand - I was really angry and sad when i talked to my brother on the phone - as if it was his fault... but i promise things will get better, and I'm always gunna be here if you need me c: