Question

I know this isn't the best but I just started on this one and it isn't the werewolf one. Could you help me add on to it. :P

Answer 1

Anna gripped my hand trembling, “Anna it’s only the doctor.” I whispered softly. She looked up at me her green eyes softening she leaned closer to me as we walked down the long tiled hall. I placed her in front of me, her tiny body warm. Sometimes I felt like I did not provide the reassurance a mother should, I had thought I would have been a better mom before I was pregnant. I ran a finger through her ginger hair. Finally we reached room twenty-four. I turned her around to face me as I leaned down to her,’’ All they will do is place shiny objects on your chest.’’ “What shiny objects Mommy. I don’t want shiny objects!” She shrieked. I was scared myself what if the surgery goes wrong there were so many what ifs. “Anna please,” I begged. Ok Mommy,” she whispered “I will do it for you.” As the doctors took her into a room I felt tears well up in my eyes. I couldn’t help it I cried. I knew people were staring at me I couldn’t help if I wanted be with my little baby but it wasn’t allowed. Could you correct any incorrect grammar or anything thank you.

Answer 2

what is up with these question marks??????????????????????????

Answer 3

Message me and I will send you what I got so far.

Answer 4

awww, i bet this will be a good story :)

Edited (other than checking the grammar,I also rearranged some of the sentences to make it flow smoothly):

Anna gripped my hand trembling, “Anna it’s only the doctor", I whispered softly. She looked at me with her green eyes and she leaned closer to me as we walked down the long tiled hall. Sometimes, I felt like I did not provide the reassurance a mother should, I had thought I would have been a better mom before I was pregnant. I placed her warm tiny body in front of me and ran a finger through her ginger hair. Finally, we reached room twenty-four. I turned her around to face me as I leaned down to her, "All they will do is place shiny objects on your chest."

"What shiny objects Mommy? I don’t want shiny objects!” she shrieked.

I was also scared--what if the surgery goes wrong? there were so many what ifs.

“Anna please,” I begged.

"Ok Mommy,"she whispered, “I will do it for you.”

As the doctors took her into a room, I felt tears well up in my eyes. I knew people were staring at me, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted be with my little baby but it wasn’t allowed.

The question marks are OS glitches, just refresh your browser and it will go away :) Anyway, this is a very interesting start of your story, it's really good.

Answer 5

That looks really good!

Answer 6

I actually added on to it it is my crazy weird friends book :P it is dedicated to her mom