Question

Poem critics encouraged as usual.

Answer 1

Action have reactions,
The dominos affect.
A million clichés as time repeats itself.
Down to the broken
Lucky ones are spoken
While some dying in the pit,
Others die in glory.
Life’s just a piece of yarn being toyed with
By a cat.
Its wound up so neatly
And one day…
It’s a tangled mess!
So easy to unravel
But as you try to put it back
You find you’re just throwing in some NOTs.
Because you’re never the same.
Just playing another game,
Where no winners remain.

Answer 2

O.o?

Answer 3

@january123 ?

Answer 4

nice but the mass tag tho...

Answer 5

@january123 i only tagged people who have liked me tagging them and who like poetry. Most people have told me to tag them if anyone doesnt want me to tag them then let me know i have no prob with that. Also if u dont mass tag in this section especailly to things like this nobody will reply

Answer 6

eh u did notice that only "3" ppl are looking

Answer 7

I have np with u taging me tho

Answer 8

it is good i got confused a little because at first i thought you were talking about mistakes but then it seems like an only few shall survive thing in this cruel world

Answer 9

@nothingwasthesame just got confused

Answer 10

and @january123 thats kinda rude to say to her because its 11:42 and she just opened it there is no need to be offensive

Answer 11

lol i mean like @ispike when i first started reading i thought you were talking about mistakes that are made then it seems like you are talking about how its hard to survive a cruel world it seems ?

Answer 12

but it is good

Answer 13

@nothingwasthesame its a bit of both. Its talking about how the world is cruel and we all make mistakes but all of our mistakes and everything that happens are as cliche aas the next person. We're all different but somehow history is constantly repeating itself. But all of my poems are up for your personal interpretation.

Answer 14

ok yeah i thought it could be both because i do believe everyone future is someone else's past

Answer 15

very nice. i dont have much criticism for you.. very few grammatical errs but other than that its good. keep writing it'll get you somewhere some day

Answer 16

@roman_princess thank u but please tell me the grammatical errors. I did use poetic licences a lot in this poem but i do need to know if i made a mistake.

Answer 17

@nothingwasthesame yea i like writing poems about different ways of thinking and other peoples perspectives

Answer 18

@nothingwasthesame so did u like it or did u not any critics. I mean i want full honesty

Answer 19

¨While some dying in the pit,¨
between the some and dying shouldnt there be like an are/were? feels empty there
¨You find you’re just throwing in some NOTs.¨
did you mean knots?

Answer 20

Okay so the first one i dont want it feeling empty but i dont want are or were either. What if i put in a comma? Would that work? Because i want that part to be kinda choppy.

And the second one i capitalized it to make it apparent that, that was on purpose. Its supposed to be metaphorical i guess. Because u can obviously tell by the sentence structure that im talking about the yarn and it getting into knots but I'm also talking about how in life some of our biggest mistakes are composed of the word not. So were throwing in some nots is correct

Answer 21

@roman_princess

Answer 22

i did like it a lot actually

Answer 23

@nothingwasthesame okay cool

Answer 24

I really like this! Wow @ispike you are soo talented at writing

Answer 25

@horsegirl27 thanks

Answer 26

Amazing as always. You have this talent for taking what I'm thinking and putting it in a perspective that I have never even considered.

Answer 27

Amazing poem! :) The words just fit so perfectly together.

Answer 28

i think a comma would do it well. sorry for the misunderstanding on the second.

Answer 29

@geneticrockhopper247 im so glad i actually want to write a book (ive sorta started) about the world in a different perspective

Answer 30

@mavagirl552000 thank u so much

Answer 31

@roman_princess lol i wasnt offended (i like explaining my poems anyways) and no prob i will change that