I have a sentence that is incorrect, according to my teacher, and I need to fix it for my re-write. Would you inform me what you think is wrong?

"When Odysseus is alone at sea, his life in the hands of Poseidon or attacking a gigantic monster, Dawn is consistently present."

Question

I have a sentence that is incorrect, according to my teacher, and I need to fix it for my re-write. Would you inform me what you think is wrong?

"When Odysseus is alone at sea, his life in the hands of Poseidon or attacking a gigantic monster, Dawn is consistently present."

anonymous · Answer

Sorry! It should be "Whether Odysseus...."

anonymous · Answer

But it is incorrect with "Whether." I just meant that it was the original.

blake4560 · Answer

The sentence is honestly confusing. There seems to be to many things at once and some phrase need to either be removed or moved around for this sentence to make sense.

anonymous · Answer

Whether Odysseus seems safe or in complete turmoil, Dawn is consistently present.

Is that a bit better?

blake4560 · Answer

This seems better. Just one question: why is Dawn capitalized?

anonymous · Answer

In the Odyssey, Dawn is a reoccurring character that Homer, the author, always capitalized. Some Greek writing technique I think...

blake4560 · Answer

Oh okay. Then it is alright. I haven't read this story in awhile.

anonymous · Answer

No problem, thanks for helping! ^^

blake4560 · Answer

You are welcome! :)