Wrote a poem last night. I regret nothing.

Question

sapphiremoon · Answer

Poem Corpus

A poem has a body.
A living, breathing soul
Far more than our technology
Powered by steam and coal.

The head of the poem is language.
The written word, the tongue,
That carries thoughts and images
From grandfather to son

The backbone is the meter;
For while it bends and twists
From free verse to pentameter,
It always will exist.

The limbs are ingenuity,
The mind, endowed by God,
Perceiving heaven’s wonders
From butterfly to frog.

And inspiration.
Ah, Inspiration.

The combination of all other components
Plus that crackling spark of creativity
That leaps from one side of your brain to the other and
Eureka! You have it.

A poem. With inspiration at its heart.
Inspiration is always at the start.

Unlike most of my work I thought hard about each line and tweaked the wording the best I was able. Any changes you think would work better? What do you think of it overall? @Atsie @quickstudent @Hope210 @Yinshy

youngstudier · Answer

*~* omgggg

sapphiremoon · Answer

lol ty @YoungStudier Any suggestions for adjusting the metered/rhymed lines?

yinshy · Answer

this does need work it needs love and by the end of today or night @SapphireMoon  it will have just that and more

sapphiremoon · Answer

ok.... lol @Yinshy

hope210 · Answer

Wow, I am speechless, it's that good. :)

sapphiremoon · Answer

ty @Hope210

youngstudier · Answer

I adored this and thinks it's absolutely perfect, but methinks @Atsie will have some helpful tips for you. :3

sapphiremoon · Answer

lol maybe she will... *winks in @Atsie's general direction*

impracticaljokers · Answer

I love this so much <3

sapphiremoon · Answer

ty @impracticaljokers :)

atsie · Answer

@SapphireMoon Wooooaah girl! I've really gotta say, this is one of the best poems of yours I've read in a long time. I can really feel and sense the thought you put into it and for graciousness sake you've described the entire body of poetry SO well!! Like it's amazing! I've made a mini critique up, and I sincerely hope it will be helpful! :)) https://docs.google.com/document/d/1F_IRhEDO98L7vpTyD0Z3fXNwTHOgYQj5x_VmcFVpXeU/edit?usp=sharing Please, keep on writing and trying and experimenting! You have such immense potential and a legacy that you could eventually be known for! ♥

sapphiremoon · Answer

Thanks so much @Atsie! I'll really take those comments to heart, maybe change a few of those lines (and that "It always will exist" part was one of the bits that was bothering me). Stay tuned for more poems cause you guys are totally inspiring me to write again!

sapphiremoon · Answer

Is anyone besides me excited by the Latin title? I really wished it could have been Corpus Poema, but that's not Latin so... lol Google Translate wins over cleverness I suppose.

atsie · Answer

My pleasure!!
And yass, I really love the title! Its very unique!! <3

quickstudent · Answer

Oh sorry for not replying even though you tagged me so long ago.

@SapphireMoon  your writing is wonderful! I really liked the idea of writing a poem about a poem, it's really meaningful. :)

sapphiremoon · Answer

ty @quickstudent! And no prob I realize it takes a while to think about stuff and then other stuff happens and you don't get around to things... (My life in a nutshell)

atsie · Answer

^my very life in a nutshell as well  :O