Question

I must paraphrase this:

Where be these enemies? - Capulet! Montague!
See what a scourge is laid upon your hate,
That heaven finds means to kill your joys with love;
And I, for winking at your discords too,
Have lost a brace of kinsmen: all are punish'd.

I was thinking this:

Where would be these enemies? - Capulet! Montague!
See what a scourge is put upon your hate,
That heaven will find means to kill your joys with love;
And I, for winking at your discords too,
Have lost a brace of relation: which all are punish'd.

What do you think?

Answer 1

Change up your words a little bit more

Answer 2

Can you give me am example or tell me which words to change?

Answer 3

Okay give me one sec

Answer 4

Ok.

Answer 5

My example would be Where must be those enemies Capulet! Montague!
See what misfortune has been my fate
The world above would kill your joy with endearment
Now the last two sentences are a bit challenging but i can try again if you want
.

Answer 6

I can try and I will tell you what should sound good, give me feedback if you can witht eh last sentence.

Answer 7

Okay try the last two sentence's again on your own and tell me what you say then i can try and help again if you want me to

Answer 8

And I, for fluttering at your dissonance too,
Have lost support of relation: all are punish'd.

Answer 9

Is this better?

Answer 10

Yass its perfect good job:)

Answer 11

Thanks. I will now close my question.

Answer 12

ok