Rate my poem

Girl the day you walked by, you made my heart skip a beat
Then days you ain't here makes me heart sink to my feet
You make my world go around-
Around like a top

When you are around, you make my face hurt
Not form playing around
But from my smile being soal bound

Girl that day you walked by, you need to walk by again
So I can regain
That memory
Hurry hurry let's make a history

Question

Rate my poem

Girl the day you walked by, you made my heart skip a beat
Then days you ain't here makes me heart sink to my feet
You make my world go around-
Around like a top

When you are around, you make my face hurt
Not form playing around 
But from my smile being soal bound

Girl that day you walked by, you need to walk by again
So I can regain
That memory
Hurry hurry let's make a history

NoodlesAndRiceYT · Answer

I rate this poem a 7/10. its good :D

afflatedAnimism · Answer

It's decent!! It may need a little more planning or figurative language to make it sound better though

NoodlesAndRiceYT · Answer

@afflatedanimism wrote:

It's decent!! It may need a little more planning or figurative language to make it sound better though

This true, thats why i rated a 7/10.

Sock · Answer

I honestly don't like it very much, overall with the writing I'd give it a 6/10 but it seems a bit like every other love song/poem I have ever heard

afflatedAnimism · Answer

@sock wrote:

I honestly don't like it very much, overall with the writing I'd give it a 6/10 but it seems a bit like every other love song/poem I have ever heard

Agree. It's a little too bland but it does have the potential

noahconnelly · Answer

@noodlesandriceyt wrote:

I rate this poem a 7/10. its good :D

Thank you

noahconnelly · Answer

@afflatedanimism wrote:

It's decent!! It may need a little more planning or figurative language to make it sound better though

Thank you

afflatedAnimism · Answer

@noahconnelly wrote:

@afflatedanimism wrote:

It's decent!! It may need a little more planning or figurative language to make it sound better though

Thank you

No problem

honeylove · Answer

it is really good I like it

afflatedAnimism · Answer

Romantic poems are  pretty hard to write. So I admire that you may be taking criticism into consideration and that you take it and don't spit it up negatively. I recommend looking at more famous pieces of romantic poems, or more subtle romance literature where you have to look deeper to understand it

noahconnelly · Answer

@afflatedanimism wrote:

Romantic poems are pretty hard to write. So I admire that you may be taking criticism into consideration and that you take it and don't spit it up negatively. I recommend looking at more famous pieces of romantic poems, or more subtle romance literature where you have to look deeper to understand it

Thank you that means a lot

afflatedAnimism · Answer

@noahconnelly wrote:

@afflatedanimism wrote:

Romantic poems are pretty hard to write. So I admire that you may be taking criticism into consideration and that you take it and don't spit it up negatively. I recommend looking at more famous pieces of romantic poems, or more subtle romance literature where you have to look deeper to understand it

Thank you that means a lot

Of course! Keep writing and you'll do great!

noahconnelly · Answer

@afflatedanimism wrote:

@noahconnelly wrote:

@afflatedanimism wrote:

Romantic poems are pretty hard to write. So I admire that you may be taking criticism into consideration and that you take it and don't spit it up negatively. I recommend looking at more famous pieces of romantic poems, or more subtle romance literature where you have to look deeper to understand it

Thank you that means a lot

Of course! Keep writing and you'll do great!

Thank you

afflatedAnimism · Answer

@noahconnelly wrote:

@afflatedanimism wrote:

@noahconnelly wrote:

@afflatedanimism wrote:

Romantic poems are pretty hard to write. So I admire that you may be taking criticism into consideration and that you take it and don't spit it up negatively. I recommend looking at more famous pieces of romantic poems, or more subtle romance literature where you have to look deeper to understand it

Thank you that means a lot

Of course! Keep writing and you'll do great!

Thank you

Mhm!

Vengeance · Answer

Honestly, I find love poems cringe, but good job though.

TaitlynCroft · Answer

I'd rate this 7.5/10 because I feel at the "around like a top" that kind of lacked efficiency for mood to me (but don't feel bad when I write poems my brain goes to the simplest words and slips off somewhere). Spelling could be better too. But other then that I love it. PS instead of "like a top" you could say "Like the hands on a clock, your smile makes time stop."

TaitlynCroft · Answer

I agree with Vengeance. This is good though

TaitlynCroft · Answer

I have trouble writing romance because my main theme I write with is Edgar Allen Poe inspired my favorite by him is "The Telltale heart" so....

prettygirl09 · Answer

tbh its bootiful UwU

noahconnelly · Answer

@prettygirl09 wrote:

tbh its bootiful UwU

Tank yous UwU