Question

Life Journal Day 1.

I'm the kind of person who likes to stay positive and happy not only for my own mental help but because i feel like i need to be that cheery person for others. I'm the one that everyone comes to for their problems and i'm either the listening ear or the therapist. It feels nice to be needed. Tho lately its been real quiet. I haven't been able to hang out with my friends for a while because of certain reasons that are absolutely ridiculous, but of course it's because of my parents. I know they mean well and that they think their doing whats best for me but little do they know its only making me have anxiety, FOMO and depression. My friends have been hanging out a lot and i'm missing out on so much. Everyone is getting closer with each other and no one comes to me for anything anymore. It leaves me in the dark with just me, myself, and I alone in my own scary thoughts. I've never felt so crappy then I do right now. I've never felt more alone then I do right now. I love to see my friends happy and flourishing in life but in a selfish way i wonder why that can't be me right now too. In a sad way it makes me jealous of my own friends and I hate that. I'm 17 years old and all i want is to experience fun teenage-hood yk? Time with friends, going out and having fun. I don't care for partying or doing crazy stuff. I try my hardest to be the perfect daughter but i'm human, I'm going to mess up yk ? I try my hardest to have the perfect grades, to be respectful and to always be helping out but it feels like nothing i do will ever be good enough. Maybe its just winter depression but I just want this feeling gone. I graduate in 4 months and turn 18 in 6 months. My worst fear is that nothing will change this year. That I'll still be treated like i'm a little girl, that ill still be locked away in my room forever. That I won't be able to grow up and get my life started. For now i'll just keep grinding in my school work and try my best to keep myself distracted from life until graduation comes along.

Answer 1

It's good ngl

Answer 2

good!

Answer 3

cool

Answer 4

I feel like journaling is a healthy way to deal with stress, good or bad. So this is amazing!