Question

Who's good at language arts or civics? :)

Answer 1

I'm pretty decent. What's the question?

Answer 2

with which subject?

Answer 3

Language Arts.

Answer 4

ok! i need help revising and fixing some mistakes in me essay.. are you good at writing?

Answer 5

Yep :)

Answer 6

ok awesome! im going to post my essay!

Answer 7

The question tends to arise quite frequently whether teens should be allowed to play dangerous sports. This is considered a controversial topic because while many kids can get serious injuries from playing dangerously, these sports can also help to promote physical resilience in their later life. Allowing teenagers to play dangerous sports can teach them how to deal with physical rok!isks that they would not have otherwise been prepared for in the future.
First of all,teens need this risk during their development, as this risk helps to educate themselves on how to handle the physical threats that they may encounter later on down the road. A teen who doesn’t play these dangerous sports will have a lack of experience with physical risk and not only that, this in turn could result in the inability to properly assess other risks. Along with this problem, the same teen will likely have difficulty finding the physical and mental courage. While having said this, these risks that are within sports are those that also go beyond what is necessary to achieve the necessary resilience.
In addition, for many teens, sports are often a way to escape reality and stress. When playing, they wouldn’t have to think about their problems, but rather they have to focus on the game at hand. These types of thoughts are often littered in a lot of teenage minds today and it’s important to refresh one’s self and be diverted towards something of enjoyment. While in the game, they would not be thinking about the stresses of school and problems within the family. This can boost the teen’s overall mood which will also reduce stress levels and not to mention provide a better chance of the teen’s development process.
However, some may argue that the teenagers are still growing and that possibly they can be injured much easier than adults can. Studies have shown that being repeatedly hit in sports can lead to brain damage as well as very bad injuries. For this reason, some believe that the teenagers should not be subjected to such activities. They believe that if people want to engage in such dangerous behaviors, they must be mature adults first.
In conclusion, teens should be allowed to play in dangerous sports because even though some may argue that the injuries can lead to permanent damage, the benefits of encountering these physical risks helps them to build physical resilience. Being in the game is a benefit that can also help to reduce their stress, as sports can be a good way to escape from reality. In other words these games can really positively affect the development throughout a teenager’s life by building this resilience and helping to cope with stress.

Answer 8

ok and this is what my teacher said i need to fix :
you have an excellent start to the body of your argument, with just a bit of editing/revision, it'll be really wonderful! You have stated your reasons and provided explanation for each. You do need to begin each paragraph with a transition, and include authoritative supporting examples/evidences along with at least one direct quote.
Listed below are the points you have earned in each section so far. If you have earned less than the points available in a section, work some more on that section to improve your total score:
5/5 Introduction/body paragraphs
7/10 Body Paragraph 1 (Claim/Support)
7/10 Body Paragraph 2 (Claim/Support)
12/15 Body Paragraph 3 (Counterclaim/Rebuttal)
0/10 Signal Phrases
10/10 Writer's Voice
5/5 Clarity in Writing

Answer 9

@lhgraythorn ?

Answer 10

Yes, I'm editing it, one sec.

Answer 11

ok!

Answer 12

its about why teens should be able to play dangerous sport :)

Answer 13

Okay so I finished with proofreading, now with editing and revising, your teacher has asked for revisions on transitions. I fixed those. But I am looking at your first paragraph, and I've noticed it is just a lot of repetition in that, so the part about adding a quote I think should go into there. What quote would you like to use, and I can incorporate it in.

Answer 14

um , Should teens be allowed to play dangerous sports?
is that good?

Answer 15

No, your teacher asked for a quote, like a quote from a professional. If I was writing an essay about the theory or relativity, I would take an exact quote that Einstein said, like "Time and space and graviton have no separate existence from matter."

Answer 16

Do you have an inspiring quote you want to use from someone in the field?

Answer 17

no..

Answer 18

Are there any athletes you look up to? Search up quotes from them and find one you like.

Answer 19

ok can we skip that part for now..

Answer 20

Okay but I need something to fill in the first paragraph. Let me see what I can do.

Answer 21

ok..

Answer 22

can you give me what you have so far though please..

Answer 23

did you fix the rest of the stuff..

5/5 Introduction/body paragraphs
7/10 Body Paragraph 1 (Claim/Support)
7/10 Body Paragraph 2 (Claim/Support)
12/15 Body Paragraph 3 (Counterclaim/Rebuttal)
0/10 Signal Phrases
10/10 Writer's Voice
5/5 Clarity in Writing

Answer 24

@lhgraythorn

Answer 25

I added some quotes and signal phrases, and rearranged some of the sentences.

Answer 26

The question tends to arise quite frequently whether teens should be allowed to play dangerous sports. This is considered a controversial topic because while many kids can get serious injuries from playing dangerously, these sports can also help to promote physical resilience in their later life. Allowing teenagers to play dangerous sports can teach them how to deal with physical risks that they would not have otherwise been prepared for in the future.

First of all, this risk helps educate teens on how to handle the physical threats that they may encounter later on down the road. A teen who doesn’t play these dangerous sports will have a lack of experience with physical risk. Not only that, this, in turn, could result in the inability to properly assess other risks. The same teen will likely have difficulty finding the physical and mental courage. While having said this, these risks that are within sports are those that also go beyond what is necessary to achieve the necessary resilience. Muhammad Ali, the greatest boxer of all time, once said, “He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life.” Portraying risks in sports only hurts the player more. Instead, we should give teens encouragement because sports sometimes isn't just a physical barrier.

For a handful teens, sports are a mental barrier that helps them take their minds off things. Sports are often a way to escape reality and stress. When playing, they wouldn’t have to think about their problems, but rather they have to focus on the game at hand. These types of thoughts are often scattered in a lot of teenage minds today and it’s important to refresh one’s self and be diverted towards something of enjoyment. While in the game, they would not be thinking about the stresses of school and problems within the family. This can boost the teen’s overall mood which will also reduce stress levels and not to mention provide a better chance of the teen’s development process. According to "Human Kinetics," exercise and sports can be a method of relaxation, and it increases physiological control. Others argue, though, that sports cause injuries that, compared to adults, are much worse.

Many argue that the teenagers are still growing and that they can possibly be injured much easier than adults can. Studies have shown that being repeatedly hit in sports can lead to brain damage as well as very bad injuries. For this reason, some believe that the teenagers should not be subjected to such activities. They believe that if people want to engage in such dangerous behaviors, they must be mature adults first. They say this too because a teen needs to focus on their future, and sports can put that at risk.

In conclusion, teens should be allowed to play in dangerous sports because even though some may argue that the injuries can lead to permanent damage, the benefits of encountering these physical risks helps them to build physical resilience. Being in the game is a benefit that can also help to reduce their stress, as sports can be a good way to escape from reality. In other words, these games can really positively affect the development throughout a teenager’s life by building this resilience and helping to cope with stress.

Answer 27

ok awesome! ca you help me out with some more language arts stuff? :)

Answer 28

Um, if it's quick stuff, cuz I have some work of my own lol.

Answer 29

ok! let me see what i got ;)

Answer 30

oh and did the essay have transitions?

Answer 31

? @lhgraythorn

Answer 32

??

Answer 33

Srry, yes i fixed them.

Answer 34

ok!