Question

So, it turns out that my essay is a bit too subjective according to my teacher, I need help revising this so it is purely objective:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1O6Gn82fG0WZI7WtxdRdWnESRL54CtRKCxSfVLb0mNC8/edit?usp=sharing

Answer 1

Provided a few thoughts and revisions

Answer 2

Thanks

Answer 3

Do you know how to use and cite sources? I think that's the largest way you can buff up your essay.

Answer 4

Surprisingly, I was not requested to do so, which confused me

Answer 5

Can you share the rubric / assignment rules

Answer 6

https://media.edgenuity.com/manuals/erater_6_pt_Informative_Expository_Writing.pdf

Answer 7

Yeah the ideas block asks for strong supporting evidence. Right now your paragraphs just sound like you're rephrasing articles. You need stuff like:

"By 1933, when the Great Depression reached its lowest point, some 15 million Americans were unemployed and nearly half the country’s banks had failed" (History.com).

The quote brings relevant information to show the severity of the economic downturn, supports your argument, and is properly cited.

Answer 8

Look for evidence like this to support your arguments, then properly cite the quotes in the text, and in the work cited page.

Answer 9

Ok

Answer 10

I tried to help you without really changing your base. Good luck

Answer 11

add quotes to support any evidence you have.