Question

Can someone give me some honest feedback on this sentence i have:How does this sound: The program will afford me the opportunity to work with a group of like minded individuals and apply the knowledge I have gained in the classroom to accomplish something tangible.

Answer 1

FYI, Tangible=Real

Answer 2

Lol; I don't have a low vocabulary, of course I know what it means.
Btw, afford..? You mean allow?

Answer 3

afford is another way of saying give

Answer 4

you think i should change it

Answer 5

Sounds good. I'm not good with this kind of things ; you should ask someone else.
Btw, would open minded sound better?

Answer 6

well, i want to say that i'm gonna work with people that have similar interests as me

Answer 7

maybe i should just write that instead

Answer 8

same perspectives?

Answer 9

hmm thats good

Answer 10

thanks bunny, i'' consider that. If you have anymore good ideas let me know

Answer 11

Alright. Good luck with that!
Btw, it sounds too brief..

Answer 12

Instead of afford, you could use offer. It's a wordy sentence, so I would split it into two. Ex: I will be able to apply....

Answer 13

Depending upon the writing context, I don't think this is a bad start (note the addition of the hyphen and the word "to" after "and")--

The program will afford me the opportunity to work with a group of like-minded individuals and to apply the knowledge I have gained in the classroom . . .

Ought the "will" to be "would"? That is, is your entry into the program certain, or are you petitioning to be accepted? If the latter, use "would."

But what is it you mean exactly by "accomplishing something tangible"? (Yes, I know the meaning of "tangible.") Aren't accomplishments in the classroom tangible? You imply here that they are not, which then seems to undermine what you *have* learned in the classroom (and which you would now like to apply). I think you need to rethink this portion of the sentence.