Question

Can y'all proofread over my shortstory I did for my English III class? I already submitted this assignment, I just was curious on y'alls feedback *I'll post it down below in an attached file*

Answer 1

sure buddy

Answer 2

There is a lot of spelling mistakes

Answer 3

looks like i wasnt paying attention smh

Answer 4

I'm surprised Googledocs didn't catch it...I wasn't too worried about those at first, I was trying to get it done before I had to go. I'll unsubmit the assignment then correct the spelling

Answer 5

i wish i could unsubmit, woulda saved years of shame

Answer 6

Are there any adjustments y'all would make besides spelling?

Answer 7

tbh no, i havent read what you wrote it off of so no 😔

Answer 8

I suggest it to be.... longer- that's like, a paragraph long-
Also, this is all action, and we dont' really get what is happening, can we have some more description

Answer 9

Here is the link to the slideshow for the instructions/directions https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1jjrORKNJvqxfRn6h-fW1UHKlFj5ceqzAcNIbepEjyqU/edit?usp=sharing

Answer 10

Request the access, I'll accept you

Answer 11

No, because that gives away my email

Answer 12

I'm not stupid xdddd

Answer 13

Just turn the link into, 'all on web can view'

Answer 14

I'm trying to, but the school has restrictions on that... I'm trying to make it to where it can be opened with Microsoft Powerpoint

Answer 15

Either screenshot all of it, or download it into your files

Answer 16

Here it is, I left some slides/blanks unfilled because the teacher said we can do it on google docs

Answer 17

What grade are you in-

Answer 18

11th grade, I'm a junior in high school.

Answer 19

Yeah, it's a simple assignment...I was mainly wanting y'alls feedback on the writing...that's why I made this post here

Answer 20

I have another question
Why are some of the phrases in there quoted....-

Answer 21

\(\color{#0cbb34}{\text{Originally Posted by}}\) @snowflake0531
I have another question
Why are some of the phrases in there quoted....-
\(\color{#0cbb34}{\text{End of Quote}}\)
its from the book (I think),it does say in the directions (Use evidence) quotations are needed for evidence

Answer 22

yeas it should be (author,page)

Answer 23

\(\color{#0cbb34}{\text{Originally Posted by}}\) @snowflake0531
I have another question
Why are some of the phrases in there quoted....-
\(\color{#0cbb34}{\text{End of Quote}}\)
They are flowquotes

They are used in place of quotedroping, it helps the writer flow their thoughts with a quote instead of just plopping a quote down

Answer 24

But since this is a short story, wouldn't it be, better, to just have everything like an actual story, like... flow-y?

Answer 25

I'll just close this, I was looking for some feedback but it's alright

Answer 26

The spelling errors can be easily changed up
also, the ...., i think should be changed, that's not really formal, seeing how you used it in this instance

Answer 27

The _/_/_...
is also a bit, not necessary inthis context, that could be changed up

Answer 28

And mainly, like I earlier said, just more description rather than just action

Answer 29

Thank y'all, I'll go with all these

Answer 30

yw~